Hi there 

so I was in remission since 2012 however earlier this year I started getting headaches again and  really bad de ja vu I knew something wasn’t right so I left a message with my doctors at the hospital I went in for a scan and a week later I still had no news so I was thinking no news is good news boy was I wrong when I saw my oncologist she looked really upset looked at me and said we have a problem. The scan showed a growth where my pervious cancer was. This time they moved quickly I had surgery end of Feb but I ended up getting a bad infection after a two month hospital stay I was allowed home

last week after finishing my chemo I went back for another scan and during the follow up they told me the remaining tumour is actually growing. I have another scan next week to make sure it’s not after effects for the chemo I really hope it is what they think a false positive 

I’m so scared this time around it has been really tough I do t want to die. I know grade 4 rumours are fast growing and can spread to other parts of the brain 

I try to stay positive but sometimes I can’t help but think what if I die what’s going to happen to my husband. I told him if I die find someone who will make you happy he told me to be quite and that I was going to be fine 

I just have a bad feeling about all this I’m thankful to god every morning I wake up does anyone else know of anyone who has had a grade 4 tumour and survived?

any help or suggestions on how I can cope will be most welcome I feel like I’m going crazy 

kind regards

parminder 

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