In June 2017 I was diagnosed with non-Hodgkin Lymphoma. It is low grade and I've just finished 15 sessions of radiotherapy. How do you live with cancer when your treatment is not for cure but control?
Just crack on, I suppose. My myeloma's incurable as well.
I've been in complete remission since February. Oddly, over the last few days I've started getting vague pains, a possible sign that it's returning.
Have my bloods done in a couple of weeks, so if things don't get worse in the meantime, I'll find out what's what then.
Got an op on Thursday to have my stoma redone for the second time. Things are ongoing, I'm fairly laid back about it. No amount of worrying's going to cure me, so I don't bother.
Hi what brilliant attitude I'm trying to be positive and every one says I look well .but I will be anxious when 3 months chemo up and MRI to see in cancer shrunk enouygh for surgery or if it's worked at all .I haven't really thought about treatment not working if it doesn't I'm down for at least 3 more months chemo then 2 lots surgery but no one has said cure .
Some people go out and grab life. For some, life overwhelms them. Me? Life has always just happened for me. It is what it is.
I wouldn't say I was positive and I've never thought of 'fighting' cancer. But I do live in the moment.
Were it not for medication, I'd have mild to moderate depression. However, for some time I've been on anti-depressants, Duloxetine, prescribed not for depression but for chronic pain. Their anti-depressant properties though, work really well for me and don't allow me to hold a negative thought for more than a few seconds. Also, I have a really, really bad memory, both long and short term and this is compounded by 'mild cognitive impairment'. Chemo brain, anaemia etc. Had this before diagnosis but it's worse now.
I can't plan for the future and have virtually no recall of the past. I literally live in the moment. So my laid back attitude or seeming positivity is simply the way I am, rather than anything active that I think or do. And being unable to ponder on things means waiting for results is not the problem for me that it is for many.
I think many cancer sufferers would benefit from anti-depressants given many of the posts on here. Maybe they should be prescribed as soon as cancer, or any serious disease, is suspected.
Similarly with pain control. Some seem averse to comprehensive pain control, attempting to tolerate a certain level if they can avoid medication. As a sufferer of chronic pain for over 30 years and then becoming pain free for a time, I can say that the level of wellbeing with zero pain is immense and I would advise that everybody seek to become pain free. Now, because of my stoma, I have to balance pain relief with controlling my digestion, an ongoing trial until my stoma's sorted and everything's properly healed.
I'm also lucky to have a very supportive wife and children, as well as extended family. Every day I make a point of feeling grateful for them all and tell them quite often.
I think my point is, is that the way I am and think, quite by accident, gives me a different perspective from most people, sort of outside looking in. I hope I've provided a couple of possible solutions that may be of benefit to some people. If not it's given me some keyboard practise.
