You ladies are so clever. Wish I was good at something like that. Don't get on here much these days but do like to read the posts. Been a funny few weeks. Just sat at the hospital for yet another appointment with the surgeon. Had hospital yesterday and hospital again tomorrow. Doesn't feel like my life is my own anymore. I think it only dawned on me not so long ago I will  be having my double mastectomy in less the  2 weeks. I outfit to the back of my mind and then it hit me like a brick wall. I've been a nightmare to live with and not even sure I want to get married anymore. I'm sure Jamie is being different with me or it could just be in my head. Did anyone else feel distant from their partners? I hope it's just a blip and just part of the trauma of cancer that's making me feel all these different emotions. I spoke to my counsellor about it and usually bounce out of there all upbeat but still had this dark cloud over me this time. Anyways sorry to be all doom and gloom......

Bad....all of the above

Good.....my little princesses 9th bday on Monday and having a party Saturday at the local stables where they take her and her friends on a riverside walk on a horse for 45 mins. Although the weather doesn't look great. Fingers crossed xx

Hi hun

ive missed your posts but totally get where u are coming from. My treatment was no where near as intense as yours and I felt my life was dominated by hosp visits. Jamie is between a rock nd a hard place, he won’t know what to do for the best.....so tell him. Tell him how u feel and what u need from him. The hard part of course is yours needs can and will change. 

You are doing so well so don’t  b hard on yourself. The chemo has done its job, so much so you are ready for the next stage in your treatment.... your op. Remember deal with today only. Ban the dark thoughts of coulds, shoulds nd woulds they are not helpful. 

Enjoy your lil ones bday (brill party idea... love it). Hug her and your Jamie tightly... your body is just the vessel that holds the “you” inside...remember it is the “you” they love. 

Sending you the tightest of tight hugs ️ X

Morning peeps 

just t say thinking of you dizzel ️

Bad :- none yay

good :- it’s so mild here... at that what the heck to wear time of year lol.

gonna knit nd read today me thinks. The lil ones are coming t mine for tea when I pic them up this afternoon- it’s parents night at the school. The appointment is on a diff day to all the others cos the teacher didn’t allocate a  late slot for after work. I get there are are only so many later slots but 3 people I spoke to had the late spots and don’t work....said they wanted them cos their mams take their lil ones for the night if they have the later slots! 

Have as good a day as u can peeps x

Ahhh thanks Sandra. Love the term your body is the vessel that holds you. Gonna say that to myself every day :-)

So after a 3 hour ...... after 3 hour wait to see the surgeon yesterday he just confused the he'll out of me by contradicting everything he said a couple of weeks ago. Asked if had any questions and when I asked about reconstruction he said he didn't have the time to answer it as he was so far behind. The cheek! Got home at 18.45 from a 3pm appointment. Joke. Now I'm sat waiting to sit on a drip for an hour and a half and it's 5pm....my appointment was at 4!!! I can feel myself getting angrier by the minute. God help the poor person who calls my name lol! Thankfully the breast care nurse I called this morning clarified a few things and I nownhave an appointment Tuesday with another surgeon who will hopefully have time to answer my questions. God I'm alright moaning Minnie this week. I hope to be back to my upbeat perky self shortly lol:-)

Hope you are all having a great day xx

Dizz that is the most disgusting behaviour by the dr. HE DOESN'T HAVE TIME TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTION????!!!! Why ask then! Who else is going to ask them when he hasn't hot his **** in order? Sorry but that has made me livid that you have been treated in that manner! How would he like to be in your position and be treated that way? How would HE feel then?

It's inexcusable and I hope you will be saying something. I get clinics run late but that's not your fault. It's hard enough getting to these appts but all these questions going on and you wait until appt day to have them answered and get fobbed off.

Getting yourself angry is only going to harm you so concentrate on trying to remain calm and get thru treatment. Just keep a note of the date, time and dr's name and sort it when you're through treatment. Then you write a complaint.

One day at a time.....

Hi cournish ..

You've given me some great info .. I'm writting with these points to a few charities and see what they say .. I can only hope ... shame no answers from our nurses to my threads about young ones effected by cancer .. it seems really sad to hear them on here, feeling so lost .. and struggling ... this is great for us older ones but I'd love them to get their own heading ... 

Thank you so much for your in put ... Chrissie x

Hi to all our lasses on here .. Rilley when's the big day ...  

Sandra .. have you got results back yet .Will look back to see if there back yet .. but fingers crossed all's well .. we got on the ropes ... my check up is November... x

Big day is 26th October. Being done in one of the entrance halls at work so very public!  

That is gorgeous Sundial!  I can’t knit, when I try it looks like something the dog has chewed:(

Oh believe me I will be doing something. I came out of there so angry and had the biggest stress headache. My breast care nurse I called this morning couldn't apologise enough although it wasn't her place to. I have never felt such an inconvenience to someone. Practically pushed me out the door. When he said he didn't have time to answer I literally sat there in shock. Wasn't til I was out the anger kicked in. Wasn't feeling in the greatest mood anyway and that almost made me keep over lol. I will definitely be complaining