You were number fifty in the phone queue at your surgery!!??!  I thought  my surgery was bad and have never been more than tenth in the queue.  I am also amazed that they had an appointment free at 10am if there were that number of people before you - were they just ringing for a chat?    I comprehend less as I get older.  Who opens a coffee shop with only three tables.  People who don't want customers?  Perhaps it is just pretending to be a cafe and it is really just a front for something else!

The sun is shining; it is raining, a bit of thunder and the wind is blowing; some confusion somewhere in the weather.  It's a good thing that tomorrow always arrives as it gives us another chance at getting the day right!  Annie

I know Annie, things amaze me everyday.   At least now we don't pay an extortionate amount for the surgery number now, which we did before.  I've  actually got washed and dressed whilst waiting, totally bizarre.   No thunder yet, but pr will be as just watered lawn, ,xx

So we had a little discussion last night and both agreed that the treatments had done nothing for him apart from halve an incurable tumour.   We really don't know if it's been worth it because in the seven months since radiotherapy finished we could count on one hand,  the good days.  He hadn't  realised it's half term next week and is not looking forward to having family here twenty four seven.  I leave him in bed this morning and when I arrive home just after eleven he has only just come down stairs.  Everything is a struggle, the bladder infection,the stiff neck,  the shoulder pain, it's debilitating for him.  I had to get up at 5am as the wind was so fierce it was blowing the curtains horizontal due to my love of fresh air and combined heat I'd left windows open.  Mary and I go to buy new kitchen chairs which we struggled to get in my car and then I've had to lift them out on my own, so I'm exhausted from lugging them around!  Garden furniture arrives tomorrow,  probably why the weather has changed!   

I have to miss zumba as my furniture is arriving so I wash the kitchen floor and pick up all the dust that has blown in from the new grout,  chuck out numerous dead flies and the dreaded wasps and hubby stays in bed.  He has had a bad night and I leave him to rest.  This gives me time to work in the kitchen, which he normally hogs.  After all the warmth it's chilly today and the sun has disappeared.   Hubby has just come down and it's  nearly lunch time and his painful toe is still hurting him and his thumb looks infected form where he hit it on the door.  Everything is taking months to heal and it's very worrying to see.  He says he is going to tell the Oncologist exactly how he feels but I know from past experience that he will not be as forthright as he should.  He's old school and respects these people, especially when they have been kind to us.  It's our neighbours silver wedding today,  another couple blighted by cancer,   both Debbie's Mum and her sister died of breast cancer at a young age and Debbie  is always scared of getting it herself.   Hurry back you two I need furniture putting together! !

Hiya.  Your poor hubby; any gains have been made at a high price (I wonder if he is questioning how much more treatment he is prepared to tolerate.)  Sorry to say that; I have got into your habit of calling a spade a spade - but it is not my husband we are talking about - I don't actually have a husband - just to clarify in case I am spreading confusion in my wake.

So it is you who has caused the changes in the weather - buying garden furniture indeed! A friend/handyman - Jim - called round yesterday and trimmed back all the bits of bushes that I could not reach - at least I could have reached them if I had stood on a stepladder and used the trimmer thing - it's one of those that  you have to charge up beforehand - but even I knew that my confidence in my ability to do this safely was not very well founded.  Paul, the friend who lives with me, kept saying he would do it but he is even less steady on a stepladder than I am so I was pleased when Jim just took over the task without asking.  I am trying to simultaneously kill off moss in the lawn and plant some more grass seed.  Fingers crossed that it isn't the grass that is killed off while the moss thrives.

Hope you are not feeling too frazzled.  Annie

Hi ANNIE,  good luck with the lawn.  Mine looks nice, then I weed and feed and it looks like armagheddon,   so this year it's not being done!  Luckily I have a Lady gardener who is a lot younger than me and bounces better when she falls off ladders.   Norman has only been up an hour and is now asleep again, his infection is keeping him up in the night.  You're right, no more chemo etc. I will back whatever he wishes as he is even too tired to think about anything.  Immunotherapy is next so let's see where we are at next month.  It's good to have friends, I'm lucky most of mine are still here so I have support if I feel down.  Looking forward to seeing the family, it's  nice to have a laugh with the children. Love Carol  x

Well , who's a clever girl then?  I have managed to assemble my two new chairs all on my own!!   A lot more padding on these for his bony bum and plastic top on prosthetic leg so may help with the wounds.  I've just tried to a put my new garden furniture together  (time twenty minutes according to leaflet)  but twenty minutes later I have an arm and back assembled but can't screw them together on my own!!  Hubby has gone to Richmond for some fresh air, his heel has opened up again but the terrible fatigue is a little less today.  I have been invited to a wedding exhibition , through the ages, tonight so I'm looking forward to seeing what they wore years ago.  I've had a busy day tidying the garage up, getting rid of boxes and going to the tip.  I drove past our beautiful green open play areas on the way and some one had thrown a mattress on it, how can they do that, the tip is five minutes away, it's scandalous .  I'm hoping the glorious weather stays for when the family arrive, we could do Saltburn as the Ship Inn allow us to park there and hubby can sit on the wall and watch us all.  See you tomorrow .

I sleep like the dead and don't hear any up down, up down with the crutch and bladder infection, good job he didn't need me because I think I would have slept on.  I have a chiropodist appointment at eleven for my poor worn out tootsies,  which have a massive bruise on them due to me dropping the plastic jug full of bird feed on them!  Feet beautiful and not covered in hard skin and I come home to a hubby who says he feels a lot better,  yippee! ! Are you up to putting a garden chair together,  yep, let's go for it.  So two hours later,  24 bolts, washers and head covers,  we have four chairs to sit on and my bum tried them out for quality control.   We never fell out, even though he tried to get me to put the left side on top of the right side as the chair was upside down!  This is the first normal thing we have managed in the last fourteen months and we feel deliriously happy with our achievement.   A good day for once,  I won't get cocky because tomorrow is another day.  Love to all of you struggling out there.  Stay strong. X

We both sleep well and I decided to go to Darlington.   Hubby takes me, he seems more upbeat and I go for coffee and a date and walnut scone feeling content .  I buy Alfie two books, one of which the author signs as he's in the book shop.  Unicorn hair slides for Ella and ham and egg pie for us.  The town is bustling and I stand and watch the children chasing giant bubbles being blown by clowns.  The children love this simple play and really things don't change do they?  I receive a text from my Stepmother saying her sister has died.  I'm not upset as this intelligent midwife was diagnosed with dementia aged 55 years.  Five years later she went in a home and has lived in limbo for fifteen years, so I buy a card to send our thoughts to Enid.  Back home the sun comes out and we both snooze in the conservatory.   It's 8.30 pm and hubby is failing a bit like the light of the day.  He's gone for a bath as we are lunching out tomorrow.   Another good night should help.  See you tomorrow. 

Well he didn't have a good night  as his toe gave him Jip all night as he put iodine on it after his bath. I leave him in bed, go for papers mow the lawn and hose down the patio as the new grout looks like hard sand! I catch up with the neighbours who have just arrived home from Devon having had a wonderful time.  I'm so jealous, a holiday, I wish.  He's just wandered past the window and is mowing our joint lawn, he is such a lovely friend to us and is putting my table together for me.  Hubby finally comes down at noon looking smart for our lumch out, he tries so hard when he must feel like just giving up half the time.  So I have a new white linen top on,let's see if I can manage to not get gravy down it!  Xx