We have a slightly better day but hubby's mood  is not improving.   He is tired because of the coughing and stuck in the house because of the snow. We try to go out for a few necessities and I'm trussed up in all my winter clothing trying to sweep six inches of snow off the car, our lovely neighbour has cleaned the path again and I start sweeping the snow away from the cleaned area.  Another neighbour who has just retired pops over to say he will go fo  us but hubby is brusque with him and says he wants to go out.   Dave offers to help sweep the snow and promptly sweeps it al over the cleared area and All over me as I'm brushing the other side.  I'm now covered in snow and have to get the snow shovel out to clear the already cleared pathway !!  I say thanks anyway and off we go.  Hubby moans all the way there and I'm lost as to what is going on, we get back home and he promptly falls asleep in his sheepskin chair.  Today it's minus 8 degrees and our neighbours come in for coffee,  I think this may cheer him up but when they leave he wants me to go for a newspaper,  I refuse and tell him  I'm not risking my life for the Daily Mirror, another sulk, ,so I say go get it yourself, he actually considers this until the snow whizzes past the kitchen window  and the cooker hood rattles.  So he's back in the chair for another nod off.  I've had to cancel my lunch/cinema day out,  I hate winter!  See you tomorrow if we haven't frozen to death.

Hello again.  Some things (by which read lots of things) are definitely sent to try us  I hate the cold too I could mention certains words that would be x'd out by the moderators if I said what I thought of the swirling snow and the cold, cold,cold.  I suppose I should be grateful I live in a city where many of the roads are kept clear but I don't feel grateful!  Before going to bed last night I put out some odds and ends from the fridge out for the foxes; I know we are not supposed to do this but they have become a fact of life now and they need to eat.  So they had a supper of fish fingers, spaghetti bolognese and some raspberries(!)   How long is this weather going to last - you must be tearing your hair out!  Let spring come soon.  Annie 

Hi ANNIE,  I still have hair left!  My daughter lives in Surrey and has just phoned to say Harry was off school due to snow but there was none!  It's ridiculous when I went to school come hell or high water you got there either by walking, bike or any bus that turned up!  The trouble is we are housebound as it is so bad.  The wind is ferocious and it's dark already.  It makes you eat more as well because you need fuel to stay warm. We haven't got any foxes just birds, hedgehogs in summer and a big fat rat that keeps appearing due to the fields.  So wrap up warm and Spring is on its way!!

Love Carolx 

Both daughter's call and ask if we are OK in the frozen North! Do we need care packages sending (only joking as they know we cope). I feel sorry for old age pensioners who can't cope but we are pretty strong and have a friendly community looking out for each other .  A neighbour popped over today with a card and present for hubby's birthday on Sunday and offers to get anything we need, but we are going to brave the weather and go grocery shopping because we need a break from these four walls.  His mood seems a little better today but everything is still a hassle and causes his mood to change. I call this blog living with cancer and it would seem each day is a challenge in a different way.,  One friend said he should embrace his results and enjoy life, yes if you are fit and don't have a death sentence constantly over your head, you probably would.  But life is not that simple and those living with cancer cope in their own way.  People need to respect how they live one day at a time and we all know if you haven't got cancer ,  or live daily with it, you will NEVER Understand .  So back home safely, feet up, Shepherds pie for tea and batton down the hatches.  Take care all of you. X

We both pigged out on shepherds pie and I added wine!  Hubby is still struggling with his sore leg and James Cook cancelled Monday's appointment as the parts haven't arrived. We didn't know we were waiting for parts so a little surprised at that.  He was up coughing again in the night but not getting me out of bed, which is helpful as it is minus five during the night.   I go to town as it's his birthday tomorrow and I've bought him nothing.  A Jeremy Clarkson book (his hero even though he punched someone in the face) two new jumpers and a coffee and scone and I'm back home.  My sister in law is coming but she phones to say her sister has been admitted to James Cook either with a seizure or another stroke. Everyone is falling apart, even Sue as she had an op on her wrist yesterday and can't drive.   I offer my services for next week but hope the weather is better than this.  I'm not sure if we are going out for lunch tomorrow, it's not been mentioned again and I'm getting to the stage where I don't really care, it's been such a hassle the joy has gone out of the treat.  See you tomorrow .

Hubby is 72 years old today and I'm not sure we thought we would make this milestone last year. He has not been at all well although most people say how well he looks!  He has huffed and puffed and moaned all morning,  choosing the only shirt that needed ironing and a pair of trousers that a button needs sewing on.  I carry his  presents downstairs and he decides he will have a bath so can he have them upstairs  instead,  one ot hem is weights for strengthening his arms so I stagger back up to his room with them.  He opens everyone's but mine and says how lovely, mine is a book that Jeremy Clarkson has written (his hero) but all I get is , oh not another book!  I feel really hurt by this and leave him to it whilst I get the papers.  When he finally comes down I have gone for  papers,  fuel so I can drive,  ironed his shirt,  sewn a button on,  made him tea and biscuits,  run up and down the stairs and he has the audacity to say we will be late if I don't get a move on!!  I go upstairs,  swear out loud and decide if he wants to be a miserable  old git he can get on with it.  The doorbell rings and our neighbours have bought him gifts,  he thanks them profusely, smiling and laughing, I could merrily kill him.  We put our coats on and the bell rings again, it's my brother travelled over from Gilling and he practically pushes him back out the door telling them we are off out.  I tell them to come in, this is so rude, I'm going to start and be a bit more normal with him as he is acting like a spoilt child.  We have just arrived home after a lovely dinner at the Otter and Fish and a relaxed atmosphere,  he has enjoyed himself, eaten well and looked happy.  Tomorrow I am on a mission to get him back to being more responsible for himself and not as patient as I have been, normality needs to reign in this house!!

Hi Caz

I just wanted to say to you what a wonderful person you are. I’ve been following your posts since my Dads diagnosis of stage 4 cancer since December. You remind me of my mum.. She’s been doing a lot of running around for my Dad and she gets moaned at by him! 

Sadly my Dad has taken a turn for the worse he’s at home with us looking after him. I just wanted to say what great job you do and make sure you look after yourself!

Kind Regards 

Tilly

Happy Birthday to your husband

Thanks Tilly, I am sorry to hear about your Dad and know what your Mum is going through,  It's  quite galling when you do your best and still get moaned at.  Thank you for reading my posts, I say what I feel so some days are quite bad and some good.  Cancer rules, even though you try to not let it.  Stay strong, your Mum needs you.  Xx

Our evening turned into a nightmare.   Hubby had trapped his false foot between the kerb and my car twisting it badly so instead of waiting until today to get it repaired properly he decided to do it himself.   He hacked at the cosmetic padding,  ripped bits off it, slammed it down on my dining room table scratching it which he said he wasn't the least bit bothered about.   I don't think the two Guinness  helped , and he was getting angry and frustrated and as usual I was getting the brunt of it. 

The I Pad beeped and it was our daughter and grandchildren face timing us, we went from Dr. Jekyll to Hyde in two seconds flat.  Hello, yes we've had a lovely day, yes everything is fine,  blah blah blah, you could have knocked me over with a feathe! !  Back to working on the leg I said he should leave it as he didn't know what to do, accused of not supporting him I gave up.   I am wasting time and energy I may as well talk to the leg I think I'd get more sense!  So today we ended back at James Cook for another three hours and at the moment it's comfortable.   Let's see how long that lasts.   See you tomorrow.