So yesterday I had to clean the window I had walked into not realising that as well as a head mark there were also two perfect boob marks as well!  Sarah came and helped as my poor neck still hurt.  Hubby still feels unwell and didn't want any tea, he says I'm feeding him too much and he's getting a belly, that suited me so I just had cheese and crackers and a yoghurt, I'm truly sick of staring in the fridge for inspiration and then realising it's all in the freezer.  Norman feels sick today so he says no tea fur him, we have a scan in the 25th April so by May we should have more news, I'm trying to just push it to the back of my mind and not think too much.  It's beautiful here today, Sue its 16% how warm is that, I'm happy that you are having some normality in your life it must be so nice to get back to doing more than staring out the window, walking or sitting on the sofa watching rubbish TV.  We went for a ride and I bought some new lights for the garden, they look good so we are going for more.  Margaret came for coffee as Charlotte had called, she lives near Clapham Common and had visited the flowers and cards site, it had really upset her, but Margaret and I said it was now becoming political and we felt for her poor parents, the police can be badly advised and I am aware of that from being in Court for thirteen years and seeing how many times police were brought to account during trials and arrests, but that's another story.  So take care, Carol x 

The sun is now coming out and hubby seems better, a few days on a light diet have helped and if he ate salad, which he won't as its for bunny rabbits, it would make life easier.  What do you feed a meat and two veg man who wants to cut back, I have no idea so I'm off to buy some steak and as long as I get protein into him his bloods should stay fine.  Mary is having her wisdom tooth removed today so I hope she is OK, mine was done in hospital and was a day job, or so they said.  But you all know me nothing is simple, so having got an infection in it, I looked like I had gone ten rounds with Mike Tyson, there were little old ladies who had had all their teeth removed sat eating a full meal whilst I couldn't even drink through a straw!!  To cap it all having been in for four days they ran out of beds and moved me to the men's ward where I was given a room with windows facing into this ward, the sights I saw would turn you off men for ever!!  The lady I worked for at the time rang to see why I couldn't go back to work because of a tooth out, she came to see me and nearly passed out at the state of me.  Well offf to get milk and some more Daffodils as they cheer me up.  Love to you all, Carol x 

We've had a couple of funny incidents today that made us laugh.  Lisa said would I buy Harry a T shirt from Among Us, I'd never heard of it but it's a branch off from  Star Wars, so little people are among us.  Having found it I showed hubby but he managed to push the button on my phone so Siri appeared, sorry I said my husband pushed the button inadvertently, "I thought that is what happened" Siri replied, you should have seen his face, is that bloody phone answering me back he asks, yep I replied, well sod off he shouts in the phone!!  Then watching a gardening programme the man tells me that he uses wine corks to lift his plant pots off the ground, I tell hubby this trick, shall I order you a crate of wine then, ooh yes please, he shook his head and said I give up!  Anyway Margaret and I have walked Hardwick Hall grounds, the Canada geese were out in force and making a horrible noise, ducks with bottoms in the air, Grandma's with babies in push chairs, everyone desperately trying to live a normal life.  We then drove to a coffee shop and had cake and coffee  (well I had cake) and sat in the cold wind as we're not allowed inside.  So that's it today, oh Mary's tooth came out fine.  See you tomorrow, Carol x 

I didn't post yesterday as my sister in law has managed to poison me with M & S chicken and rice soup that had travelled from James Cook in her car and was luke warm when I ate it, so I have felt giddy and sick and keep burping!  Apart from that she is doing fine, kidney check up hence hospital visit, her tongue is healing well and she goes back next week.  But she says it's been very lonely sitting on her own each night and working from home alone.  Luke has bought the original house that they lived in which is about twenty foot away but doesn't sit with her at night at all, they lived together for years so he was always there but Hannah moved in so she is now left alone.  Luke apparently told her that Hannah is scared of her and that she has The Look, what does that mean I asked, The death stare she says, that's ridiculous, for Luke to relay this to his Mum is typical male cop out, how will Sue ever feel comfortable in her company now?  We've been to buy more lights as Norman is feeling a lot better, we went the long way round as he keeps driving round pot holes in the country roads and it makes me feel sick, go the normal way and I'll be sick in your lap, OK he says looking worried.  I was sat in the conservatory as the day is beautiful but Linda is mowing her lawn, I'm not sure why as it's just brown patches with a few green shoots, I got cross with the noise and said to hubby, if she mowed round the brown bits it will be done in five minutes.  Last year she saw mine and asked how I kept it green, because I don't scalp it twice a week like you do!!  Obviously she took no notice.  We've just posted all the Easter gifts off, I can't believe that we won't see family again, apparently there's a big anti lockdown protest in London today, I know how they feel!  Love Carol x 

It was a beautiful day yesterday so we had a ride out and enjoyed the Daffodils, crocuses and all the spring day joy that has been missing during the long winter months.  On the way home we called at the village and spotted Keith walking so we stopped to chat, he had managed to visit June last week in the care home but she has completely gone he tells us, he took her out for a walk but she had no idea where they were or what they were doing, so, so sad.  He then tells us that Pauline is ill, now Norman used to coilurt her in the day and we have all stayed friends for over sixty years.  He said she looked awful but no one had called her family so he had given a friend her sisters phone number.  Anyway her family have flown over from America and the rest are going to follow, so I called another friend and it seems the outlook is not good, another sad day.  I've been gardening and also bought some cushions with rabbits on for the love seat and an imitation potted plant for the table as the real one needs watering and shoots mud all over my table.  So take care all, love Carol x 

So our dear friend Pauline has terminal ovarian cancer, another missed case by her surgery who she has been seeing about her health for the past year.  It takes me back to the terrible time that despite multiple scans we also were neglected until it was too late.  She had attended Aand E a couple of weeks ago, Chris had taken her as she was so ill, they sent her home.  Her son in law flew over from America where he is a top surgeon at the hospital and examined her finding she had fluid on her lungs, he blue lighted her to hospital and they found the cancer then sent her home as they can do nothing.  Chris says she is on oxygen and morphine and does not accept how ill she is.  Pauline is one of the kindest, social butterfly, millions of friends, church going, charity funding woman and it is so sad that she has been left like this.  David her husband had brain cancer and was at our daughter Lisa's wedding, he came and sat at the top table during a break as he had known her since she was born, Matthew the wedding planner came over and explained the cake was coming and it was the family table, listen mate he said, I'm dying, so until Carol or Norman ask me to move I'm staying!  His funeral was on Norman's 60th birthday, we had been at Fayes flat celebrating and we got a train home from King's Cross,  a taxi home, changed our clothes, hopped into our car and drove to the Wake.  We have all known each other since the early sixties, had our babies, drank, danced, laughed and cried together and now she is dying.  We've attended for bloods today and I watched Norman walk to the doors, grey face, long grey hair as he can't get it cut and hobbling on his good leg, he looks old and ill but his attitude to life is amazing, I don't know how he is still with us, I hope to God that we can see our daughters soon before it's all too late.  Take care, Carol x 

Margaret and I have been to South Park this morning for a good walk and to clear my head, it certainly did that as the North East wind could cut you in half even when it's sunny.  I'm back home and have a zoom call with three friends and my wine and lemonade is ready to toast us all.  Hubby is now asleep in the sun as he has a niggly cough and looks very tired but he is doing well.  It's immunotherapy tomorrow so back and forth to the hospital and hopefully mow the lawn in-between.  Life seems a little easier now it's spring but I saw an old photo yesterday of us all at our afternoon tea day out dressed as 1920 ladies, we all looked so happy and never knew that two years on what state we would be in.  Take care, Carol x 

I have a black cloud over my head, waiting for the inevitable death of a friend.  Keith managed to see Pauline and it has spread to her lungs they didn't think she would get through yesterday, all so quick.  Norman said it hit home as he obviously has lung cancer and can now see what will happen.  I've just collected him from hospital and he got annoyed when I said be careful of the car door as it is heavy, hence some swearing and me saying fine hurt your leg, I won't say anything next time, tempers are short.  On a lighter note Lisa and Tugs are buying a holiday property and tomorrow I'm going to see three of them in Richmond, don't get excited I'm told, we may look elsewhere in the North, Whitby, Scarborough, the Dale's or Wales, oh crikey not Wales I say that's miles away from us and having been there they speak Welsh when they know you are English!!  So that's it for today.  Love Carol x 

So I had a conference call with my daughter and son in law and was given instructions on what to look at in the three flats, check the drawers, cupboards, kitchen fixings, stairs in case creaky, could I also test the water pressure, how am I supposed to do that I ask incredulously, turn the tap on says Lisa, so when I met Richard the agent I asked him to do that for me, let's just say its excellent as he was showered in cold water all down his jumper, oh that's good then I smiled!  So having reported back to those who must be obeyed Tugs is driving up from Surrey to have a look and we are meeting him there for a coffee and cake whilst sitting on a park bench in the freezing cold wind.  I rang Faye as it was Easter finish at the school and she was home early, everyone was asking what are you doing for Easter, I said stuffing your face with chocolates and watching TV, she then said she'd been given a kinder egg, Box of chocolate and creme eggs from the school, well there you are Mum is always right, stuffing your face with chocolates and staying in, we both laughed.  So tomorrow I'm looking at another property for them, I'll let you know how it goes.  Carol x