Hello all

It's been a beautiful day today, the winter sun really picks you up.  Been a good day in all ways today.  Dave had some visitors this afternoon from the rugby club so I left them reminiscing and went to visit my parents (90 and 89).  They manage very well on a day to day basis but my mum is very forgetful and must have asked me 20 times what was wrong with Dave and if there was anything she could do.  It's hard telling her over and over again, but I'm getting better at it!  My dad is a saint really as she says the same things to him all the time.  He does all the housework now, but she insists that she still does it!  It's sad, and I feel that I have neglected them a little over the past few months, but mum is happy in own way and dad's happy looking after her.  He knows I'll be there if he needs me.

Ooh I love Radley bags.  Lucky you Carol.  What would we do without good friends? Is Norman's cough getting better?  Coughs always seem worse at night but you sound worried about it.  

Dave feels well enough to go to Kendal tomorrow for a couple of days.  Our apartment is up a steep hill so I'll have to drive him up and down but no matter.  A change of scenery will be good for us both.  I may even get some Christmas shopping done so that I am prepared if he gets the hospital call.

Annie, are you feeling any better?  Have you seen the Dr about your back?  I wonder how Gloria is. Thoughts are with Sue.

Thinking of you all,

Julie xx

Hello all. Had a couple of rough days. Rang haematology as the new lump had gone into an open sore as the others did. The moved my check up appt from the 3rd Dec to 27th Nov but this was still two weeks away and I was concerned as the area around the lump was getting inflamed and panging. Specialist nurse suggested my GP. My wonderful GP straight away said it was an infection there, put me on antibiotics and also gave me some diazepam to help me sleep and calm me down. She asked when a biopsy was being done. When I said it had not been arranged she immediately set it up as urgent and to be done within two weeks. I feel better that something is being done to sort this out. I am praying it’s a benign one like the last one I had on my breast. Don’t know why perhaps it’s my immune system down. The hospital have been wonderful but it seems once you are finished chemo and in remission they have done their bit but you still need help and advise. Gosh I’ve ranted on sorry girls. Helps to talk to you. Carol hope Norman’s cough improves soon. I love Ridley bags. I’ve one my daughters bought me. Julie hope you and Dave enjoy your time in Kendal. Annie hope your back feels better soon. Look after yourself. Lots of love and hugs to you all xxx

Gloria thank you for letting us know how you are, it's good that your GP has put more effort in for you and I'm sure we are all sending our love and prayers for a healthy outcome.  It must be hard to live like this and as I've stated in previous discussions on here we do seem to be abandoned after treatment.   This is why a good support system is helpful we can listen, talk about our concerns and know we won't be shoved to one side.  I arranged to meet Mary for coffee up steps hubby, I'll drive you.  This is always a big mistake when he's not well but trying to get out of it is pointless !  So he drags himself out of bed,  moans about his leg, tells me his took the scab off his toe after nine months of healing, makes another cup of tea and by now I'm losing the plot!   It's 9.15, foggy,  wet and we're meeting at ten am.  He throws a strop,  chucks his tea down the sink and stomps off to the car!  I trail after him and say how lovely it is to be driven by such a happy cheerful person, he gets the message and changes his tune  So the coffee shop I've visited since I was fifteen and attending secretarial college is closing next Friday, well miss our scones and coffee there, it was like an old shoe, comfy and shabby.  A pop up Xmas shop has opened so I buy lots of little gifts for the children , unicorn pencils, story books,  stickers and a book for himself .  I notice Smith's are selling half price wrapping paper so get that and back home Harry's Fingerlings dinosaur has arrived,  even I was thrilled with it, Harry will be delighted.   My new cleaner arrives and she's my type of person,  you know the type , well spoken , nails done, nicely dressed!!!  So I now have the job of firing my old one but I can't cope with people who can't even make a bed properly.   It's the little niggles that run me ragged, not the big problems that I know have to be dealt with,   the house needs to run smoothly so my hubby can be cared for without his wife being run ragged.  The fog has cleared,  fish and chips for tea, wine for me and a night at home.  Love Carol xx 

Julie how lovely to hear from you.   A break will do you both a power of good.  Enjoy your stay and fingers crossed on the call front, it's like living in a parallel universe when you cope with cancer.  My Mum had dementia and when Norman lost his leg, she cried then asked me every time I saw her, what's happened, it drives you bonkers,  but it seems your Dad is coping .  Don't feel guilty there's not much you can do when you're coping with Dave, we all only have so much energy to expend on others once on the cancer treadmill .  I have been doing some shopping and feel quite happy to have started it.  Kendall will have lots of pretty shops with different goodies.  Catch us up when back home.   Sue is doing OK but it's hit her hard over the last week so I've kept in touch privately.   Enjoy your stay.   Love Carol xx 

Hi ladies.  Am sitting on a heap of cusions to keep myself comfortable at my computer.    Just had a phone call saying they were from Visa and Mastercard fraud and they told me an unusual payment was coming in on my account and had I made it.  I hadn't.  I hate this - I am sure it is a scam but think "what if it isn't?"  I am too polite sometimes.  Anyway I politely refused to answer any of their questions and said I would ring my bank, declining their offer to transfer me and remembered not to use the same phone number on which they had rung me (my landline).  Anyway the lady at my bank was great, checked both my accounts and assured me there were no dodgy payments in evidence and told me what a clever girl I had been (well, not exactly, but it felt like that).   She told me my credit card account had been blocked by the bank because it was over two years since I last used it but told me I just needed to ring them to unblock it when I wanted it.  I am glad I learned that piece of information or I would probably have panicked if I had gone into PCWorld to finally buy a new pc (my neighbour, whose equipment I am using, is due back from Australia in a few weeks) only to find I could not use my credit card. 

Oh my dear friends, it is good to be settling back into some sort of routine and talk to you again.  I do like to hear from  you and I am so sorry that you have such real problems compared to my wingeing!  Annie

Dear Annie,  you're not a whinger, it's nice to have a life outside cancer!  Bad backs!  Fell down stairs whilst expecting Lisa so by the time she was born I was in agony, long story short I ended up having to wear a made to measure steel corset,  as I walked out of the fitting I bumped into an old boyfriend,  hello he said looking me up and down what are you now an Air Stewardess!   I looked at him puzzled,  apparently he'd watched me walking down the corridor ram rod straight and putting two a two together came to five!  I wore that steel corset for a year with a new baby on one hip a five year old and a job as a waitress at the village Pub, but it worked and I'm still walking tall!  So Annie there's hope for you yet  scams are horrible I only ring the number on my card, I've read too many scare stories.  I had one last week threatening to disable my broadband because I hadn't taken notice of the first call!  All well and good but I'm not with BT.  I know we're all getting older but those poor people who don't read newspapers or see the news or have dementia it's horrendous and time it was stopped, properly.   So queen of Arabia sat on your cushions you're as important as the rest of us girls.  I've just spent a fortune watching QVC Christmas sparkle jumper ordered,  crepe black trousers and because I've spent so much I get a voucher to spend more, hooray!xx

A really boring day today.   I slept well last as hubby didn't cough.  I seem to be tuned to his cough like I was when the babies cried, it permeates my brain.  However I laid in bed wondering where the musical noise was coming from, I gave up came down stairs to find my mobile going off as I'd forgotten to re set the alarm from last Saturday's early start!  Tesco for food, I hadn't shopped since before Faye came home but looking at hubby's tummy he needs to go on a diet.  I write some thank you cards, pop up to Mary's with hers and Joe's,  scoff chocolate ginger biscuits, drive back home and make a hot curry for tea.  So a glass of wine,  Strictly and more wine.  I think we're going for a ride out tomorrow as he's  feeling better .

This husband of mine is losing the plot!  He's cough, cough early morning so I take a cup of tea and tell him in my firmest voice (ie cross) that it's not getting better,  from the depths of the blanket's he says,   it's the daffodils .  What bloody daffodils I say, the ones on the bed side table,  these daffodils are actually silk hydrangeas!!  I shake my head, give up and go for the  newspapers,  have coffee and my pan au raisin and leave him soaking in an Adidas  bath,  perhaps if I shove his head under the cough might stop, only joking, I love him really but I ring my younger daughter and tell her  that for an intelligent man her Father can be pretty stupid at times.  So rant over I calm down, send her a photo of my bag and she's suitably impressed!   Hubby has finally surfaced ,it's a beautiful day, fresh, blue skies, sunshine,  so we're going to travel the Dales and find a pub, I need a strong vodka and lime! !  Xx

Hiya.  I have been mooching around on the forum for a while and seeing your post decided to come over here.  Has your man got anything for his cough or is he just determined that it will pass eventually.  I know men can make a lot of noise to indicate their unwellness but shake their head when offered something to sooth it.  Something to do with being masculine?  Have you  been out today?   (You are probably out now.)  Are you around Sue; I do wonder how you are managing; I know you have family and friends but they are not around in the small hours of the night when you cannot sleep.  And you other lovely friends; how are things going this weekend?    I hope there are not too many things to worry about but if there are I hope you will share them.  My sister Rosie is coming down tomorrow to spend Monday night before she goes shopping in the West End on Tuesday morning.  On Tuesday evening we are meeting up with our cousins Anthea and Catherine to see Dream Girls (no idea what it is about but should be a nice evening out).  Paul will have to look after Muffin.  Most of the house is like an obstacle course at the moment as I have just left all the boxes where I last dropped them in case I do more harm to my back.  Oh well,  good job it is only family coming.  xxx