I think something has gone wrong Taff as I don't remember saying we were flashing each other!! Only joking,  Hubby needs to do something more with his life, after all the treatment is meant to give you a longer life span.. He is intelligent and needs encouragement to do things, it's  not bullying him and I think that word is bandied around too much now days,  If you upset some one its  not necessarily bullying and he can stand his own ground!  I'm glad you're keeping up with my posts, thank you.  Carol x

My neighbour is revamping his bedroom and starts banging way at 7.30 am,  so I end up tangled in the bedclothes and go to zumba covered in tramlines all over my arms from the creases!  I have twisted my knee and it hurts, so I leave before the end so I don't damage it more.   I have a quick turnaround as I'm picking Sue up at one pm, so hubby gets a quick kiss and is left to his own devices.  He had met a retired army guy yesterday and he had joined him for a pint.  It was nice to hear him telling me something different than the usual daily politics and flipping Jeremy Clarkson! !  Lunch in Barker at  Northallerton and she goes for the bus to her sisters, she thinks I'll get lost if I take her.  I just meander the store and my phone rings, she's missed the bus, so we meet again and I drop her off, as you can see I made it home.  Hubby seems content today and is eating well but has made his toe sore again.  Things are healing so slowly and it's worrying.   A full day at home tomorrow, let's see how that goes!

Hi Caz, Didn't mean to suggest you were doing any bullying, rather that reasonable encouragement can feel like bullying, by the recipient. I was actually meaning me and the way I feel very occasionally.

And I have needed encouragement. To eat, to move about, even to to wash sometimes. But there's never been any actual bullying. I suppose I've taken the opportunity to feel a bit of self-pity from time to time but as I've said, it's only for a few seconds.

Hi Taff, when you are going through the trauma of cancer, self pity is allowed,  you always seem upbeat to me.

The SUN is shining and the sky is blue, wow a lovely day in amongst the horrible ones.  I get my jobs done and tell hubby we can have a ride over to Hartlepool and have fish and chips and he says OK.  But once again politics is his main object and the newspapers.  I am cleaning the kitchen windows and ask if I can have Ken Bruce on for a little light heartedness but his eyes harden over and he is not giving in!  So by lunchtime I tell him we either go now or not at all.  We get in the car and Jeremy Vine is talking on about Brexit and passports and he turns the radio up so loud I am getting earache so I ask him to turn it down, he turns it off.  We don't say anything for ten minutes and neither of us is giving in, well this is going to be a pleasant afternoon.   He breaks the ice first and we get our lunch,  drive to the headland and stuff our faces.   As an fork lift truck fitter in his working life I have a tour of all the sites he visited and stories of what they operated as.  I've heard these a million times before but he's happy reminiscing so I'm happy to listen.  Back home now,  cup of tea and back to the TV! At least we've had a good few hours out together .  James Cook tomorrow, I'll let you know how it goes. 

It can be a very selfish disease, this cancer. It sometimes seems that every situation or every conversation, ends up being about me.

Even so, no matter how little I care about my health problems, there's simply no way of getting away from them. They're always there and always have to be taken into consideration.

Cancer is selfish, although we rarely discuss this it is always below the surface and can only be pushed down so far, before it resurfaces.  We got up early to leave for James Cook and three hours later we are back home, minus the leg!   However,  hubby seems pleased with what has been done and we are back on Tuesday for the full kit and caboodle , he can't wait.  I do hope it lives up to his expectations or I'll have a very unhappy hubby to deal with.  Our friend rings to ask if we are going to the Rotary Do tonight and he says yes!  How exciting,  a night out together with good friends.  Our younger daughter calls and we have a chat and a laugh she is doing a school spring walk this afternoon with Harry, but it's very cold there.  The trains to London are driving her insane so she is resigning when she gets back from her holiday, it's too stressful never knowing if she will get home on time for H and it's not good enough and very stressful.  My stepmother apparently is having a hard time with her chemotherapy and they have stopped it.  Her only son (my half brother )) lives in Australia and as she has very few friends she has struggled on her own with no family or help,  Hubby would never have coped on his own so I feel for her that at her age she has no one, but as my Mum would have said, you reap what you sow.  So feet up until we go out on the rave tonight!!  See you tomorrow 

We stayed out until 11pm!  A good night, food I didn't have to cook and a funny group on the stage and an X factor singer whose Grandma and Grandad were celebrating their Diamond wedding anniversary.   Everyone gave their services free and a lot of money was raised for a new MR I scanner, which all of us on this forum know is  very important.   Hubby is reaping the downside of being out for hours, his toe is sore and I have had to plaster his bum again!  He is now snoring in the conservatory and will be there for sometime..  I have managed to book us in for Sunday lunch on Easter Sunday as I find it hard cooking for five and trying to keep everyone occupied,  I don't need stress as things are comfortable at the moment and it's easier to just sit and be fed!  I have finally moved the rat catcher from the garden (we live near fields) and he noticed it today, did I LOOK for a dead rat inside?  Er no,  I do enough without looking at dead rats, that's a man's job, he actually agrees.  Let's see how long it is before he looks!!  So a quiet afternoon, as a busy week ahead,  shopping for family arriving,  parcels to post and I have been invited to a lunch at Headlam Hall on Wednesday with some of the girls from last night.  I love Headlam our daughter had her wedding there and it's beautiful and a lovely reminder of a marvellous day had by all.  See you tomorrow 

I don't sleep well and keep waking up feeling giddy, I think it was the pulled pork on Friday!   So I get up make tea and put the radio on,  get washed.  The news comes on and it's 11am, how has it taken me two hours to pull myself around, then the penny drops, the clocks have gone forward !  I let hubby know and he doesn't believe me!  Because the TV hss not altered it's time he switches the I pad on and spends five minutes staring at it, I laugh because this is so typical of him, he doesn't believe a word I say  I do a load of gardening and sweeping up have a chat with neighbours and before I know it the Grand Prix hss begun.  An easy tea (was going to do Sunday lunch) I'm not up to eating much .  Hubby looks good and is putting weight back on, I've a feeling the taken in trousers may need letting out soon.