I think I first introduced myself when I found out I had breast cancer or Colin as I called it.  I guess I have been getting on with it I had the op and then radiotherapy all done just before Christmas.  I had a nice holiday away in Fueventura just after Christmas it was fab.  I came to realise yesterday that I have been bottling everything up and to talk about how you feel is not a weakness.  I have been drinking too much and I had a complete meltdown and everything came tumbling out.  I lost my cat two weeks ago and that hasn't helped.  Sometimes you feel so scared, every ache and pain you worry what if it has come back.

i have been feeling sorry for myself today but I have so much to look forward too.  I am getting married next year in Jamaica, I have just got a brand new car and I have a fabulous fiancée.  I have two wonderful children and grand children.  

so I have decided to kick my butt, get fit and lose some weight and cut down on the booze.  It is great you have this forum as I bet I am not alone in how I feel.

it was nice to have a moan and talk.

take care

jainey