well the title says it all. I'm 4 weeks on from RT and i feel ***!! no sleep unless i pop a sleeping pill. stimach so bloated i feel like a fat pig! waking up hot flushes, close window because im then freezing. its now 6.45 A.m sat bold upright as stomach so upset.is it the Tamoxifen ? Yes !!  I felt extremly tired from Rt and sore but not like this.! and they want me to do this for 10 years!  I feel depressed because i feel now at 45 my life is over and I don't have long left before it comes back! I know I cannot live like this for 10 years!!  I am single and it also depresses me to think my sex life is over at 45 as Who would want to bed a women with no energy, fat stomach,sweating all night insomniac ! Rang breast care nurse she wasny much help suggested I take a holiday on my own and leave my kids at home if they didn't want to go! ( as if! im lonley enough as it is why would I pay hundreds of pounds to sit at a dinner table alone all week? what a crazy suggestion.)  Oh and I've stopped speaking to friends as quite honestly I'm envious of their perfect lives with new boyfriends and holidays!!  *** off? you bet I am.