Hi kim, thanks for getting in touch. One day there will be a cure, but at least we don't pity each other on here, nobody looks down on you, nor judges you - it's fantastic. But woweee you've been busy! Hope you get some well earned rest! Donna x

Crikey, this one has had a lot of reaction in such a short space of time! If I was unfortunate enough to be a celebrity, I too would restrict the news to close friends and family. 

My own reaction probably had as much to do with my family history as anything. I'd been a close relative to two people (my Mum and my Grandad) who had been cancer patients and knew that I appreciated their honesty from the outset. We were a traditionally English family, not given to emotional outpourings or drama, both of them just got on with the job of fighting this horrible disease with the minimum of fuss. 

So I was as open and honest about it as possible, when it was my turn. My wife was involved in all the meetings from the Upper GI consultant giving me the preliminary diagnosis through to getting the CT scan results following chemo - I'm not sure I could have gone through them on my own. 

For practical reasons I made sure my immediate colleagues were aware of my situation ... hard for someone who hadn't had a single day off sick in years to hide my disappearance for tests, scans and eventually chemo sessions. If I'd not said why I was taking time off, people's imaginations would have filled in the gaps and wrong conclusions jumped to. I'd enough tocope with, without having to dispel speculation and rumour lol   

I didn't have the problem of pitying looks or comments - though I did get the odd well-meant but irritating comments along the lines of "but you can't have cancer, you look so well." 

Best wishes
Dave

I told family and friends immediately.  They were amazing and have travelled my journey with me, coming on holidays, days out, lunches and constant visits.  Now things are getting a bit difficult, and communication isnt always possible they understand and check with my daughter before bombarding me with questions.  It took a year before I accepted I had cancer (was sure they had made a mistake).  When friends come round we spend 5 minutes discussing how I felt and what was happening and that was it, I had got it off my chest and they knew where I was at. Then we chat about life as we used to.

I had one friend, of 20 years, who just disappeared,  but that's okay, I can deal with anything now.  Well, almost anything.

Kim, that's exactly how my mum felt, that my dad didn't trust her to share how he was feeling after 40+ years of marriage. So hard for her to get to grips with. I sure it was part denial and part not wanting to stress her out of worry her...