Hi,

I am sorry to butt into your discussion but just wanted to wish you all well.

You all seem like tough cookies and am touched, truly.

I am currently waiting, I have my breast clinic appointment on 27th oct and really nervous, not eating or sleeping much to be honest but then I don't eat much anyway lol.

Really don't know what to expect with this appointment just that I will probably be having an ultrasound as I'm only 24.

The reason I went to the GP was because I have bloody nipple discharge and a rather deep dimple. I can't help but think the worst but do understand there are benign causes for this out there. Just glad my GP took me seriously.

Do you mind if I ask how you ladies felt at this stage? Am I insane or am I being normal?

Best wishes everyone

Kylie xxx

No Kylie,

You are not insane..... first let me say you are very sensible to see your doctors immediately.... you would be surprised how many think they are too young so don't bother.

I know this is a very scarey thing to try and come to terms with... and the waiting is the hardest bit.... If I had to discribe how I felt when I was waiting for appointments and tests then I think the only word I could come up with is....LOST... Very emotional and scared to death.... but I now know that all these feelings are perfectly normal.

If you are worried about what to expect, why not ring up your breast clinic and ask them.... they are normaly really good and have no problem explaining what you should expect.

When my doctor refered me to our local breast clinic, I was examined by a lady doctor, then I had to have a mammogram and an ultrasound scan..... I would suggest you take somebody with you... maybe your partner / Mum / friend just for a bit of moral support.... but I have to say that the breast care unit and all it's staff were brilliant and really did well to calm all my fears.

If you have any questions at all, please feel free to come here and ask, there is always somebody who has been in the situation you are in and able to offer help and advice.... we are all here for each other.

Take care honey... and try not to imagine the worst (easier said than done)

Love Caz xxx

I just wear my little skip cap from monsoon, it's been my life line lol, do you not feel as though your wig is going to fall off? I had it on one night and a friend came up and put her arms round my neck to give me a hug and my wig moved lol. I'm prob just not used to it, I don't wear a net under it, oh I just want my hair to grow back, it's what's holding me back. How long do you think it will take to grow to a decent length? X

Patricia.

What a horrible thing to happen.... just when you thought you were going to get a break.

We all talk about the not knowing being the hardest thing to cope with....... but I think maybe in this case, the knowing is worse..... it must be a nightmare for you both.... after you going through it all... and seeing the way you struggled with everything.....

And I don't care how old our children are.... they are still our babies.

I am praying so hard that it is nothing major

Please let us know how you get on

Love Caz xxx

Mine moves too, but then all my family and friends know its a wig so I dont really care, as for the million dollar question ...how long before it grows back...well I reckon around 4 months before its a nice short hairstyle that you can wear out, judging by other people I know, ive heard sea kelp helps but not sure how long after chemo before you can start taking supplements.

Listen hun weve come this far whatever happens now will only be an improvement and just remember you will have those lovely long dark eyelashes back before I do lol so hang on in there cos I think your a star xxxx

Lee xx

hi girls

patricia thinking of you love hugs prayers xx sending u all positive vibes can think ofxxx

colly and lee know what u say about looks and wigs i have really nice wig but my head gets really itchy think i try that cap like u said dont know if i missed it colly but how did endoscopy go hope all ok .

caz hope u all ok

love to all xxxxnina xxx

Hi Patricia and the rest of the gang

Just wanted to say I'm thinking of you, Patricia. This is a worrying time. You've been through the mill, and now this big worry. Let us know how he gets on tomorrow - and you of course - it will be very difficult being there again - especially under these circumstances.

I also just wanted to chip in on the hair-lessness discussion! It is now about 4 months since my last chemo and my hair is fab. It is a charoal grey, slight curl, and incredibly thick and soft. I'm even tempted to keep it this way! Lots of people have commented - 'It takes years off you' etc. (Must have looked a right sight before!)

Seriously though, within a couple of months, I started feeling a lot less bald and almost chic!

Re eyebrows and eyelashes - they grew back really quickly, and once they were back, I felt much more human. I do remember my eyes feeling very gritty and watery - and that's just because the eyelashes weren't there doing their job as little windscreen wipers! I also found that I had a permanently runny nose from lack of nasal hair! But again, this grew back in really quick too. As for my legs - well they're like Kielder Forest again!

I hope this helps. All these things you're having to put up with are all temporary, and whilst they are awful at the time, at least you know that you WILL start feeling normal again a short time after the treatment stops.

Hang on in there, girls.

Much love

Shents x

Thanks lee you always say the right things, mwah. Nina appointment cancelled as oncologist said to try the tablets first and to be honest the pain is away now, so we're thinking it has just been chemo that's caused the lining to thin which in turn causes the terrible heartburn etc x

Shents thanks that's good news and normally my hair grows very quickly, it is coming through and is brown, yeah think youre right re eyelashes and nose hair, my leg hair is coming back just now, still nothing down below lol x

Hi all,

Patricia, stay strong, some time we find strength when we don't think we have any left. the fear of not knowing is often worse than the outcome. Once you know - you can start on the road to putting things right again. I wish you both well and lots of love and hugs.

Thanks ladies for your tips in regards to the wigs, I WILL be buying an undercap of somesort. I have thought about practicing with false eyelashes before mine fall out, but i also wear glasses and always have had 'dry' eyes. Contact lenses are the best for me as they seem to protect the eye - but not good with chemo i should imagine. However, I do think glasses will help prevent with wind grit and dust and hide those hairless eyes. If you go to Boots and look around the nail care/eyelash curler type counters, you will find a 24hr black or brown felt tip style eyeliner. Tiny dots along the eyelash line - leave to dry and then put on a normal pencil eyeliner in a slightly lighter colour, you'd be amazed at the result. Being very similar to a felt tip in design it is easy to use - you really won't need much practice and it washes off reasonably easily., but is waterproof. Stand a foot from the mirror and see how good it looks. If you're really brave - draw the lower eyelashes with tiny lines very short ones but plenty of them - ive seen this done and it looks great- im just not that steady with my hand and havent managed to achieve it - sstill a few weeks to practice i guess.

Lee, I was suprised to see how you felt without your wig, I think the picture you have is just gorgeous and i really do mean that. i don't look that good even with hair and eyelashes. Some of us are just blessed with those lovely features that look good no matter what. Your picture has inspired me to learn more about makeup and confidence - i want to look at least as half as good as you during my chemo and recovery.

shents, you have given me hope with eyelash growth, i thought maybe as they were the last to go they would three times as long to grow back. I have heard other ladies say how much better their hair is after chemo in terms of thickness and length - but only once the growth becomes established. it is nice to hear from someone who can verify that! Yes we can cover naked head with wigs and things, but how do you hide the eyes? Tony did you lose your hair and eyelashes too?

Caroline Colly Rose and Nina how are you all doing ? keep smiling, you have also been such an inspiriation to me.

Love sara xxxx

bless u sara

the anticipation is almost as bad as real thing . we are all different but some things it seems are the same , the thing with the eyes mine r same its nightmare as try wear more make up to distract from bald head hey ho . fact chemo is rubbish but we have to do it so we have to cope as the girls say hopefully all sid eaffects r transient. i too have got stand by false eyelashesbut luckily still have them at present , funny how we all chat from different parts country xx great to speak to u all xxxx u are so special thanks xxx

love hugs xxxnina xxxxx

Hi Patricia,

Thank you for your post, Sara too. Such lovely ladies all of you.

Patricia I had my fingers crossed for you today.

I wish you all well.

Luv kylie xxx

Hi Patricia,

Thank you for your post, Sara too. Such lovely ladies all of you.

Patricia I had my fingers crossed for you today.

I wish you all well.

Luv kylie xxx

Hi Girls,

Thank you all for you support.

Well panic over, relatively good news. They think my son has got gynecomasti. He had to have an ultra scan (made me laugh when he was complaining about being covered in the gell and trying to get it off, said 'now you know how us mothers feel only you haven't had to drink loads of water and need a pee! LOL

I did get to meet my new breast consultant/surgeon as well, the other one I had had a heart attack a week after I had my surgery back in Janurary and so decided to retire once he was better. She seems very nice, will be seeing her myself at the end of November.

Patricia x

I,m soooooooooo glad Patricia,you can have a good nights sleep for a change.!!

Always something to keep us on our toes.

Have a good weekend

Rose xxx

dear patricia

so pleased for u enjoy your weekend

love hugs nina xxxxxxxx

Thank goodness patricia, you must be so relieved x

Hi all, so pleased for you patricia, if I had a drink - I'd be drinking to you both. Nina, the look good feel better have a CD (can't remember where I actually got it) and i watched it this week, it is really good. I have the details of my local one which is at the hospital I have to travel to for chemo and radio, but I am definately getting in on that one. Anything to help me feel i look normal and feel pampered has to be good.

RD, your message really meed me smile, what a wonderful lady you must have! i have to say I felt inspired and thought yup, time to get a grip girl, and i hope i can be as brave and find a new style for me. And colly thanks for the tip on hot water and veins - i haven't even started yet and it was worrying me. I always feel when I come here that I have something to come away with that makes me more prepared and more comfortable about the journey ahead. thank you all.

well, it's half term week and the little ones here are unwell with sore throats cough and high temperature. I've got a bit of a sore throat so hoping it stays where it is and doesn't turn into the awful bug the kids have. On a brighter note, my man said last night we should give up smoking. Oh yes yes yes, at last I don't have to do it alone and wont be miserable every time he lights up and I want one. So, nicotine gum and inhalers ready - just need the lozenges - just in case..... wish me well all as the air in this house will be blue, and the doors slammed a few times before we really get to grips with detoxing the nicotine. What a time to choose - chemo coming up, kids off school, none of us exactly well and the bills are all due this week too. Never mind - still smiling and just one more step to a healthier me.

Love to all

sara

Well done Patricia - and good news about what they think it might be - though admittedly I had to google gynecomasti - I'd never heard of it. I hope they can get him sorted ok.

Must have been hard going back to the hospital, but you've done it now, so good on you. I hope you both had a little sippy of something when you got home.

Take care, bonny lass

Shents x

PS - Thank you Lee - I have been following the thread whenever I can, but now have a limited amount of time to contribute as I'm now back at work etc. You're all doing so well. x

Hi Patricia,

That's great news! I hope you all feel better now.

Hope you've all had a good day today

Kylie

Patricia

What great news... I bet you are so relieved.... I am so pleased for you.

I am back to hospital tomorrow.... I get to make a decision on wether to have the hormone injection..... but it's a no brainer.... if the injections stop my ovaries producing oestragen , which in turn means there is less chance of oestrogen feeding any left over cancer cells.... then you know I am going to have the injection.

They will also be draining the infection..... I am still on the antibiotics, and feeling pretty poorly, but to be honest I put that down to the infection..... I will be pleased when I am feeling better.

I have got a family wedding on Thursday.... I am a bit nervous about going, as it's the first time I will be meeting lots of people that I haven't seen in years and I am a bit wary about being out in public................

In fact I have a real problem about going out, I go to the hospital and to the local shop... but going out where people can see me.... I am very self concious, Dave says that nobody is staring, but I know that I no longer have any breasts..... My cleavage was always a very big part of who I am..... it is almost like... when they removed my breasts they removed my self confidence too..... and I don't know how to pick myself back up.... Dave is being brilliant, he is always telling me how gorgeous I am.... but I seem to be stuck in this slump.

Love Caz xxx

Hi Caz,

Hope your hospital visit tomorrow goes well and the infection clears soon.Manuka honey is supposed to be ggod.I put it on the wound as well.

I know how you feel about going out,although mine was only one side,you feel everyone is looking at you but when we went to my sons wedding last year 2 women came to talk to me and i didnt know that they had breast cancer so chances are you wont be the only one there with this although it will feel like to you.I have had to change a lot of my tops as i am slightly different shapes either side which no-one else notices but I know.I dont look at other womens boobs so i dont expect they look at mine,but i have a lot more flowery ,patterened tops and not the plain jumpers that i used to wear.There are so many big necklaces that distract the eye and waistcoats are good.After a few wines you will feel great.As you know too well the wondering is always worse than the event.Bet you will look a million dollars!!!This is a big first for you so dont panic.

Good luck sweetheart,you can do it

Rose xxxx

Hi girls,

i have just been shopping and saw a Post op. bra in George at Asda with a pocket on each side for £6 !!:shocked: Bargain!

Love to all you lovely people,

Rose xxx