Hi Richand,

I know that this isn't what you wanted to hear and it is so difficult dealing with this, when you have no definite timelines. I was devastated when I found a second cancer in the same breast, within less than a year from my original surgery (for a less aggressive cancer). I had already lost my mum to secondary breast cancer, so was terrified of recurrence. 

I eventually took myself in hand, saw a counsellor at Maggie's, attended Breast Cancer's "Moving Forward" workshop, Pain Management Classes, the Haven, exercise classes and a number of other courses. We also formed some self-help groups. These made me realise just how important it is to make the most of each and every new day that dawns. I also lost a close friend, who was nearly 20 years younger than me - not to cancer, but by simply falling down stairs in her own home and breaking her neck. She was a super fit individual, who had few medical problems. This drew me up short and brought with it the realisation that none of us know when our time is up, and there's no point in worrying about what might never come to pass. Doctors can at best give you a "guesstimate", but this is only based on average figures and it can be way out, in a good way, as well as a bad one.

Instead of bemoaning the fact that your time on this earth may be limited - or may not, my advice would be to try and persuade your family and friends to embrace each new day and try to make memories together. This will be so much easier for all of you, instead of letting your diagnosis get you down. The results following your chemo sound hopeful, so, I sincerely hope that your prognosis turns out to be incorrect.

Do please keep in touch and let us know how you get on and remember that we are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx