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When it gets real: worried about starting chemotherapy

Chris9
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Just finished radiotherapy on my leg after bone mets removed. It's strange that I've had quite a lot of surgery and had radiotherapy before too and not been particularly anxious but then discussing chemo I began to get a sinking feeling that I've not had before despite the optimism of the doc. Finding it hard not to go to darker places. Telling myself it's cos the chemo is unknown. I'm sure it will be ok but my stomach is churning and feeling quite weepy.  Lots of people much worse than me I know but hard to control the feelings. Sorry for the self indulgence just wanted to get it out. 

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    Hello Chris9,

    It's not self indulgence at all - you are right to come here and express yourself and get it all out. This is precisely what the forum is for, being able to offload with others who can truly understand what you are going through. It's normal to be worried about starting chemotherapy - as you say it's the fear of the unknown but it's great that the doctor is showing optimism. Our website has in-depth information on chemotherapy which I hope will help you prepare for your treatment and if you have any fear or question you want to discuss, don't hesitate to ring our nurse helpline on this free number 0808 800 4040 - their line is open Monday to Friday from 9am to 5pm. 

    I am sure other members of our community will be along shortly to share their chemotherapy experiences with you - I have edited your title slightly to include the words 'chemotherapy'  so that it can be spotted by others who have had chemotherapy before. It helps to talk to others who've been there and who will understand your worries and concerns and who will hopefully be able to alleviate them. 

    Best wishes, 

    Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

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    Hi I just had second round today after radiotherapy also have immunetheraphy too o was exactly the same about Chemo I’ve never been so scared in all life it is the not knowing I kept crying at silly parts of the day and night leading up to it people kept saying your strong your do it I’m thinking no I’m not! Went in and it was ok I just told myself I’m just getting medicine to make me better had canula put it and it was fine came home cooked dinner etc! Then day 2 just got very tired took all antibiotics sick and steroid tablets and was fine but second round was very tearful again put a film on my phone and home again it’s really not as bad as I first thought just lots of people going to get better! Hope you go ok good luck 

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    Hi Chris. Oh no it’s not self indulgent at all.

    it the fear of the unknown I think. Don’t be hard on yourself.

    A friend of mine’s son had gone through chemo (aged 11) and that made me think that if he can do it so can I. He’s great.

    I think the word Chemo terrifies us.

    I’ve had a mixture of Gemcitabine and Cisplatin, 2 wks on and 1wk off since beginning of December 2023 for Bile duct, Peritoneum and Liver Cancer.

    Side effects for me are alway varied from loads of energy (probably from steroids) to shattered…..Headaches but not bad.   I think I’ve been lucky.   Oh I did have low temp and had to ring helpline to go in to get checked. All was ok. 
    Try to listen to your body and rest when you should.  I’m terrible for not doing that then end up in bed for a day at a time resting.

    I think I do get subconsciously anxious if I’ve to get up and go to appointments etc and as soon as I start getting ready I get very dithery and it lasts all day but I don’t think that’s the chemo.

    I do wish you well and remember that we are all different and it will effect us differently.

    All the very best to you x

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