Hi janisF, you are not alone in this. I am nowhere as far on as you, not quite a year post diagnosis and did not get clear margins on my masectomy. I guess, we never really if we are honest with ourselves can just cope without the reassurance of the hormone therapy (if we're lucky enough to have had it - not all cancer patients can) and yearly scans. Although, our masectomy side cannot be scanned and I know that reoccurrence still happens after masectomy, I guess we're just less likely to spot it. I'm not trying to be negative, although, I have my fears and struggle with them. I think that when the reassurances we feel secure with have to go due to our nhs system, we just have to try our best to look out for the signs of reoccurrence or secondary cancer, but not get so obsessed about it that we stop living. We have life and we must try (even in this awful covid climate) to live it and breathe in the fresh air). I'm sorry if I'm rambling, every day is not a good day and that's fine, but we still deserve good days. 
 

Virtual hugs Mickey xx ️