Cancer Research UK main site
  • Replies 1 reply
  • Views 282 views
  • Users 0 members are here

Terminally ill father in law

Poppet123
Offline

Hi, 2 years ago my father in law was diagnosed with terminal cancer treatment was reducing the cancer to a certain degree. However it's now stopped working and he's been given 4-6months to live. Hes quite young, in his late 50s. Within a few weeks he's really deteriorated. He has been advised to remain in bed now by the nurses. 
My husband's family are all very strong people and are keeping their emotions in. 
Im not emotional when im with my father & mother in law but afterwards im really upset and for days afterwards. I feel wrong for being like this as it should be me supporting my husband and not the other way around. I get annoyed at myself but that's not helping the situation either. 
can anyone offer me advice on how to deal with this better than I currently am? 
Thanks 

  • Hello Poppet123

    I'm so sorry to hear about your father in laws diagnosis and that things have recently deteriorated. It's understandable that you're upset. Although not a blood relative, this gentleman has been your family for some time and I'm sure that you care deeply for him. Of course you're upset about things. And I suspect that you're probably feeling upset for your husband and mother-in-law and all that they're going through as well. 

    Have you spoken to your husband about how you're feeling? If not then I'd encourage you to chat things through with him. You may find that it does you both the world of good to talk about things and it may make it easier for him to talk to you about how he's feeling. 

    We do have some information on our website that may be of help and if you'd like to chat with one of our team of nurses at any point you're welcome to call them on 0808 800 4040, Monday to Friday 9 am to 5 pm. 

    Be kind to yourself Poppet123. This is a difficult time for you all. We're here any time you want to post on the forum. 

    Best wishes, 
    Jenn
    Cancer Chat moderator

Speak to a nurse

Quick links

Follow us

Registered with Fundraising Regulator (logo)
Cancer Research UK is a registered charity in England and Wales (1089464), Scotland (SC041666), the Isle of Man (1103) and Jersey (247). A company limited by guarantee. Registered company in England and Wales (4325234) and the Isle of Man (5713F). Registered address: 2 Redman Place, London, E20 1JQ.