just been given my results ,i'm not sure how to feel

hi

, i've just been given my results and I don't really know how to feel, my emotions are making me feel stressful, I haven't 

been upset as in crying , my family are trying to come to terms to.

I feel angry more than anything and maybe a bit lost even a little alone, but I'm far from being alone I have my family around me , and very close friends . I guess being alone due to covid at the hospital appointments don't really help but I understand thats the way it has to be. I'm trying to put on a brave face but its exhausting . is all of this normal. 

  • Hi Oliver,

    Are you okay? What were your results?

    Georgie

  • Hi Georgie, I have just been diagnoised with breast cancer, HER2 was positive . everything seems to be out of my control. my op is march 29th. i don't know how i'm supposed to feel, its a weird thing. I felt angry at first I can't seem to focus on it. i'm trying to as normal as possible for my family. you know how it is. thankyou for replying to my message. what is your situation. thanks  

  • Hi Oliver

    Just wanted to say I am very sorry for your diagnosis. I too have been diagnosed breast cancer (triple positive) and am currently undergoing chemotherapy before I can have any operations. The positive HER2 diagnosis was a huge blow to me because it was thought it would come back negative and I wouldn't need chemotherapy, but here I am, 2 chemo sessions down out of 6.

    You are still at the initial stages and it all feels completely surreal. Emotions get the better of you but it sounds like you have a great support network. You will start to feel better once your treatment plan is sorted and you begin. Lean on your family and friends if you need to, lean on us too if you need to, we are all in this together.

    Stay as strong and positive as you can, but remember it's okay to scream and shout and cry if you need to, lord knows I did.

    Amy x

  • Hi Amy , thankyou for getting back to me, it's really kind considering you're  going through this crap too. 

    thankyou for the advice much appreciated. can I ask you a personal question while having chemo will you lose your hair I never gave it a thought until someone made a strange comment ... which was my daughters wedding is shortly it should have been last year, bless them they had to cancel on three occassions I know in the great scheme of things losing my hair shouldn't bother me , but it really scares me . how did you find it or did it not happen to you.  sorry if i'm being a little to personal. 

    xx   

  • Not too personal at all, I'm happy to answer any questions you have if I can.

    I am using the cold cap which aims to limit hair loss (although some hair loss still occurs). My hair is very long and very thick so wasn't expecting it to be very effective.

    I didn't start losing hair until day 16 after my first round of chemo (but hair loss was quite minimal and no one could tell). I thought "great the cold cap is maybe working". Then about 4 days after my second session (so last week) I had a shower and lost a fair bit of hair on my crown. It looked like I had an ultra wide partning. I was completely expecting that and thought I could cover it with just a hat when I went out, but unfortunately this wasn't the end for me.

    When I washed my hair I noticed that my entire load of hair had somehow knotted up and matted, I mean my hair was like in one huge dreadlock. Me and my mum spent 5 hours trying to untangle it, got half out but lost a lot of hair in the process. Unfortunately half of it could not be saved so ended up having to cut a huge chuck of "good hair" away. So now I'm looking at wigs incase I lose anymore hair.

    If only the hairdressers were open I would have cut my hair shorter and had it thinned out before treatment. I haven't shaved it (not sure if I am going to) but today I cut the ends so it now sits at my shoulders and I wear a chemo turban to cover my thinning crown. I'm going to wait until my next chemo session and see if the nurses says whether it's worth going forward with the cold cap or not.

    Obviously everyone is different but you probably will have hair loss/hair thinning, it usually depends on which chemo drugs you will receive during treatment. It was just an unfortunate incident for me that my hair matted up so badly, otherwise I would of probably just had hair loss on my crown and thinned everywhere else over a longer period of time.

    I've heard that the cold cap works well for a lot of women and they only really lose hair on their crown which can easily be covered or hidden. Hair loss is a very scary thing, we all know it will grow back but that doesn't make it less of a concern. I would recommend trying the cold cap and then it's just a case of wait and see. On the plus side I still have my eyebrows and eyelashes! Got to take the positives when you can haha.

    I hope your daughters wedding goes forth without a hitch! I know it's easy to say but just take the joy in the day, if you do have significant hair loss/thinning there are so many options out there to help. All we can do is own our new look and visualise that day when our hair is back and better than ever!

    All the best and any other questions feel free to ask me anything. 

    Amy x

  • [@Oliver2001]‍ hi iam the same Her2 positive and i had mastectomy on 10 th of March , waiting for next step it will be chemo.unfortunately for Her2 positive chemotherapy its the plan but thats how it is. I know how its frustrating as iam in a same shoe with you and all other ladies. Its amazing to be in this forum and read people experience as my next step it chemo and I really dont know what to expect... what kind of surgery you going to have on 29th? If you dont mind me to ask you . Xzana

  • Hi, i.m due to have surgery on the 29th, to date the plan is to remove the tumour and lymphnodes from under my arm. as I to  have a HER2 POSITIVE  result   to deal with, I'm starting chemo after surgery and a drug called herseptin. i'm trying to be practical at the moment, so i've orgnised all my finances and i've put a funeral plan into place.  just in case. I realise this is a kneejerk reaction but it is what it is. I hope you're coping ok , if you want to chat I'm here anytime. xx