I'm going through this yet again at the moment.

I'm 54 and have had bowel cancer twice in the last 5 years.

I live in fear of it coming back again, like living under a black cloud.

I'm ok and then I get a new ache/pain and off I go, imagining the worst of what could happen.

I have a feeling my GP is getting a little fed up of seeing me although if I hadn't kept pestering with my symptoms in the past I probably wouldn't be here now. It took 18 months to get diagnosed the first time and over 6 months the second.

I do feel the 'what if's' are spoiling my quality of life. I hate it!

Hello. I am struggling with endometrial cancer but in reference to your cancer. My dad had bowel cancer at 65, he decided not to have chemo after his op because they weren't really sure if he needed it. 
His cancer returned within 2 years, he had another surgery then chemo and he is 83 in March!

Its never returned and he's living so far to a ripe age. He's seen great grand children too.

So best of luck. Try not to worry. my poor dad had problems being diagnosed. He went private in the end and that was when they found a tumour.

My Dads my inspiration , I just think if he can do it then so can I. I'm 52 and awaiting chemo and radiotherapy. I've had my surgery.

Ruby xx

Hello, 

health anxiety truly is the worst, you can't get away from your body. 
I have recently had CBT on the NHS and it's helped massively. Please do a self referral, your doc can give you the details. 
There's hope I promise! 

Hi 

I totally agree with what you said about a fear of death.

I have debilitating health anxiety,  I've had loads of counselling. Cbt. Nothing works. It's so upsetting. 

I take propranolol now, helps a bit.

Anxiety and health anxiety is crippling. 

The shakes, the hotness, the intense muscle pain. 

I've never met another person who sounds just thr same as me.

I don't know what else do.

It's something I'll have to live with. 

I'm waiting on biopsy results. 

Wishing you all the best 

Xx

Hello, 

Bless you. I used to think that but now every time I speak to someone with H anxiety I'm like ' oh here's my twin thinker ' . 
It's such an awful illness and catches you off guard. 
 

I used to take Valium but have learnt that I don't need it really as the problem will still remain, it's my thinking catastrophe that's the issue. Weird thing is I'm so rational with everting else but this seed keeps flowering sadly. 
 

Plesde keep us updated! 
 

My last lump disappeared, I had mouth infection at the time but didn't know, was a gland I suppose. 
 

lots of love - you're never alone 

Hello

Thankyou for your lovely reply.

Love what you said about the seed keeps flowering.

And to be a twin thinker.  It's comforting to know I'm not on my own.

A lot of people really don't understand how crippling it is 

I hide it make up and doing my hair. People would never know. I've become an expert at pretending. 

I have had Lumps under my armpit , but turned out to be cysts..

Thankyou again for being so nice

Xx 

Heya! I am sorry for your struggles.

What you're saying doesn't sound silly and I can totally relate. Growing up with a mother with health anxiety, projecting it to me and always warning me about health problems I ended up having it severely.

The solution for me was psychology, listening to podcasts, practicing affirmations and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy techniques, to reprogram my mind that would always think about worst case scenario health worries. I can attest that I am doing much better!

There is light at the end of the tunnel but it needs methodological action and to work through the past memories. Also, I confronted my mother and prohibited any discussion about health worries from her. We have a good relationship but I can't and won't tolerate to hear about these topics as they are massive triggers. Once the family knows, you can starting working on yourself to recover.

I hope all this makes sense. At least know that you're not alone. Hugs x

I'm a hair and makeup addict too! Everyone's so shocked when I tell them my ' crazy ' fears.

I am definitely not cured but I feel I've maybe turned a corner..... let's hope. 

I think that my biggest turning point had been that I don't check obsessively now, just weekly maybe and quickly. It's definitely calmed me down. Last Summer was so bad, I coudnt walk away from the mirror. It's a journey that's for sure. 

Always here if you need a chat. It's so nice to feel you're not alone or mad, we are as ' normal ' as anyone else. We all have our quirks! 
x x char 
 

Hi Char, 

im finding I check my boobs everyday and I'm always thinking breast tissue is a lump, I convince myself that is it a lump, I'm waiting on a doctors appointment today so the doctor can check, I even get my partner to stare at them to see if he can notice any changes. I'm so fed up of being terrified. 
 

im glad your getting better and had a turning point. 
 

it's nice to speak to woman who are going through the same worries xx 

Hey sorry to jump on the bandwagon. I have been suffering with health anxiety for 4 years now & every day is such a battle! Everything gets to me so quickly I am a massive over thinker but I constantly get told I'm such a hypochondriac which also drains me. 4 weeks ago I had my first ever smear. (Im 26) but for years I've been scared to get it but in a way im glad I did now because yesterday I got a letter through the door and it told me im HPV positive & low grade dyskaryosis & I have to attend the hospital on April 6th for a colposcopy and I am absolutely petrified!

Hi

Completely understand the daily battle..

Some of the messages on here I can relate to totally. 

I have tried everything it won't leave me. It's debilitating. 

I hide it as (char) pink girl said. Ie hair and make up.

It's so comforting to know I'm not alone in this. 

I have hpv too and have had abnormal cells. 

They were taken away by letz. That was over 20 years ago.

I'm currently waiting on cervical biopsy results. 

Obviously I'm worrying and worrying. 

Best wishes to you Danni x

I am exactly the same with health anxiety Only started a couple of years ago when diagnosed with Actinic Keratosis all cleared up with Eufidix I go long periods without the anxiety then something will start me off again Last week it was a burning sensation in my mouth and on my tongue which I have had before and was diagnosed as being caused by anxiety but still was convincing myself it was cancer of the mouth That passed and then a mark on my arm which has been checked looked like it had changed now I am anxious that it's  some type of skin cancer Luckily I am able to see a private dermatologist and my year,y check up is due so have an app next week at 73 years old I feel such a pathetic person

I am exactly the same with health anxiety Only started a couple of years ago when diagnosed with Actinic Keratosis all cleared up with Eufidix I go long periods without the anxiety then something will start me off again Last week it was a burning sensation in my mouth and on my tongue which I have had before and was diagnosed as being caused by anxiety but still was convincing myself it was cancer of the mouth That passed and then a mark on my arm which has been checked looked like it had changed now I am anxious that it's  some type of skin cancer Luckily I am able to see a private dermatologist and my year,y check up is due so have an app next week at 73 years old I feel such a pathetic person

Hi AnxiousBetty,

You are not pathetic. Health anxiety is a real problem and doesn't choose age or life situation. I understand it feels worse when you've actually got things checked and still worry (I get that, too) but that's because health anxiety and obsessive thoughts like that are really a mental trouble that requires help. 

You are not alone. I notice things and have bad thoughts, I wish they would stop. I use Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, that takes a lot of work and I have seen some improvement. 

Wishing you the best.

Thank you it's good to know I am not alone with these anxieties x

Hello

Yes I'm the same with going for periods not worrying.  And the bang here we go again.

I have generalised anxiety,  but this health anxiety is crippling.  

I'm stills waiting in biopsy results over 3 weeks now so I'm worried sick. Already had tears this morning. 

I hide it with make up etc and People wouldn't know. But inside I'm.a complete mess . I've had CBT. And counselling last year but nothing helps. 

Propanalol does help a bit.

You are not pathetic at all , bless your heart. I totally understand.  X I take comfort knowing its not just me.

Best wishes xx

It really is such an awful feeling I have only suffered since Covid  when it was impossible to get GP app and even though that is all behind us now still can't get to see my GP I have paid to see a GP privately and he has assured me the blemish on my arm is not sinister but every so often panic sets in x

Oh I know...not being able to see a go has definitely not helped people .

I'm still waiting on biopsy results.  23 days now. I think I might have to ring but I'm scared to.

I'm sure your blemish is ok. But I totally understand the panic xx