How do you get through the wait?

I don't really know what I'm asking here. I've recently returned to work from maternity and my husband and I thought we were winning at life having mastered our new routines, childcare etc.
 

10 days ago I randomly coughed up lots of blood and clots on finishing work. Went to A&E where a chest X-ray revealed a huge shadowy mass on the right side of my chest. The A&E doctor spoke to me in platitudes such as modern medicine is wonderful, take each day as it comes etc. I had an ECG to check I was stable enough for home so I could go back to the kids.

 

Next day, I had blood tests and the doctor at the ambulatory care unit explained it could be tumour, leaking heart? Or a blood vessel that's gone. He told us to expect the worst and sent me for a CT scan last Monday.

He's reviewed the results and asked I go in, accompanied by my spouse, on Friday. Given he doesn't want to see me immediately I'm guessing it's not an imminent blood or heart issue.

The wait is awful. How on earth do you cope with the not knowing?

  • Hi Gnomi 

    Great to hear from you,and hear that you finally have a diagnosis, but you have been through so many tests and waited a long time to start treatment whilst dealing with your symptoms,  so that aspect is distressing to hear. But there it is. 

    You are going to fight this so well, I can tell. 

    My 80 (going on 60) year old mum has lymphoma which was all over her abdominal region when diagnosed, and two years later she is perfectly well on treatment every two months which hardly affects her, and only one tiny stable tumour remaining.

    Yes, I am over the pneumonectomy now,  (correct spelling btw!) and even started back at the gym on Monday. Felt proud of myself!  My targeted therapy is going well. I had the side effects for 5 days after the first 10 day  and was unwell, but then they went and I've been really well for two weeks. Unfortunately, today I've got some side effects back so I'm confined to the sofa with chills, achy legs and sore feet ! I just can't believe I was at the gym 2 days ago, but that's what my treatment does. It will hopefully go away again soon. My oncologist says this is all normal.

    My next step is a CT scan on March 4th to see if the drugs are working. Scary, but part of the fight.

    Let me know how tomorrow goes.

    Love to you and your family

    Joy x

  • Hi Gnomi,

    How was the appointment yesterday?

    I hope you are starting treatment soon and it will alleviate your symptoms.

    Thinking of you

    Joy x

  • Hi, I only ended up getting a call to attend an appointment with the consultant at 9am on Tuesday, so fingers crossed I get information and a treatment plan then!

     

    Thank you for thinking of me,

     

    Gnomi xx

  • Hi Gnomi,

    Did you get a treatment plan?

    I am thinking of you and so hope you have been given a path to follow and symptom relief.

    Joy xx

  • Hi Joy,

    Yes they have decided on 8 cycles (months) of ABBD chemotherapy, starting a week today! 
     

    How are you? 
     

    xxx

  • Gnomi
     

    Ok thanks. Just been through a week or so of illness with my drug side effects but coming out of it now and hoping for at least a week of good health! Hopefully longer. Getting fed up with the sofa! 

    Glad you have treatment starting! Good luck with it. Everything crossed for you.

    Joy xx

     

  • Thanks Joy. I was diagnosed with Stage IV Hodgkin's Lymphoma but it is treatable. I know it's going to be really tough, especially with the baby, but I am continually amazed by my wonderful friends and family.

    I'm taking control this weekend and doing a sponsored head shave to raise money for a little 4 year old boy in my village who has stage IV Neuroblastoma. His family are trying to raise £230,000 for treatment in America. It makes me feel so lucky I can get all my treatment here so we've raised £700 already and I'll be shaving in public on Sunday and donating all my hair to the Little Princess Trust. If two good things can come out of my cancer then it makes me feel more in control!

    I hope you start to feel a little better from the side effects soon. I've just sprayed my sofa to within an inch of its life with Dettol in preparation for Friday ha ha!

    xxxx

  • Well you have certainly risen to this challenge! Let me know how the website for sponsoring you. I'll definitely contribute. It's beyond heartbreaking to imagine being a parent in that situation.

    It sounds like your support network is very strong to get you through the treatment. Cancer is not a great way to start motherhood, a time when feeling in control is so important. My children are thankfully older and self cleaning,  feeding and transporting but I hate it even when I can't walk my dogs or get to the shops. 

    But I am well perfectly well again right now and the sun is out. The plan is a two day trip to Cornwall with my husband at the end of the week after my CT scan. What can possibly go wrong?! 

    Good luck for Friday, Gmomi, and for the head shave. Brave woman.

    Joy x