Always something wrong

so this is the first time I've signed up to anything like this... 

came accross this site whilst ferociously searching the internet to find out what type of illness I might have now. Like most people on here I am absolutely terrified of cancer and am so so sorry to people that actually have it! Reading posts like mine if  you actually have a severe illness must be so painfully frustrating and upsetting but I can not get the thoughts out of my head, I'm constantly checking myself for lumps, googling my symptoms, I don't believe a word anyone says to me, I'm terrified of leaving my little boy behind, the thought tears me up inside to the point where I can't concentrate on anything else

Ive been suffering with the most mild achy/sore throat and I'm absolutely convinced I have throat cancer because I've googled my symptoms so much I basically could tick off each one. I also smoke which is obviously one of the main causes of throat and mouth cancer as it kindly tells you on the pack. I start to worry about the length of time I've had my  symptoms as google tells me any normal sore throats should have gone within 5 days so I'm starting to think 'it must be serious because I'm sure I've  had it for 8 days now'

Im contemplating going to the doctors tomorrow but everytime I go I start crying and they look at me like I'm crazy and tell me I'm fine every time. 

I only went a few weeks ago with a swollen lymph node in my neck which went down after a few weeks just like they said it would. 

If it's not me it's my son I'm panicking about, I know it won't do him any good having me taking him to the doctors everytime he gets a sweat on I just don't the know how to calm down!! I genuinely admire people that don't panic! 

I see people with genuine symptoms and they're like 'it's probably nothing- will go to the docs if it doesn't go away soon' I'm like - wow you f****** hero! I would be crying myself to sleep! 

 

Help me it's so draining! :( 

P.S - I am glad there's so many others going through the same things. I thought I was alone before I came accross this site x

 

 

  • Hi Leanns, it upsets me truly that so many young Mum's are spending their lives googling and worrying about cancer when they should be  enjoying the  life they have, none of my generation of Mum's ever thought we had cancer and as we had no social media we didn't Google, thank God.  Now obviously this is real to you, so why not ask your GP to arrange some Cognitive behaviour therapy, I've used this when I was on a course to advise on mental health, it's a way of training your brain to think positive rather than negative and it works.  The next thing, stop smoking, or you will suffer later in life, I'm living daily with lung cancer as my husband wouldn't give up smoking as he knew best, get some help, it's out there to use, so use it.  Take action to get your life on track, only you can do that, no one else.  Sending all my best for a brighter future.  Carol x

  • Honestly it's horrible! I am stopping, I've been on and off for ages now trying to quit but I've thrown my cigarettes away now I'm really trying! 

    The thought of lung cancer is terrifying. I'm sorry to hear that :( 

    thank you for the reply. I know it's ridiculous really with how much everyone panicks but most of all me! I'm laid here trying to get it out of my mind but I can't! 

    Will definitely try cognitive behaviour therapy- thank you

    X