Hi Mich,

I told him I wasn't going to have the oral chemo. I'm not sure if it's the right decision or not so more sleepless nights I expect.

I'm glad you managed to get out for a walk, it always makes me feel better. 

Let me know how you get on with your radiotherapy

Sleep tight with all that sea air

XX

Hi Sue, 

You've made the best decision for yourself at this time. None of us know what's around the corner. 

Hope youll be able to sleep easier. 

Thank you, I'll let you know. 

Xx

Hiya Mich

Hope your first rads went ok...the machine is a funny thing isnt it - like something from outer space lol :-)

I'm (and Linda should be too i think ) halfway through now and have had no side effects at all yet...the staff are lovely and usually not much waiting around. Hopefully yours will be the same fingers crossed.

Linda, Karyn, Davia, Claire, Suebea, Jan and Sacha - Hope you're all ok and if i've missed anyone hoep you're ok too lol

Love to all and stay safe xxx

I have one more rads to go on Monday woohoo, hope yours are going ok i so far have no side effects just a warm boob after it, hope yours are going ok Mich.

Hope the rest of you ladies are doing ok xx

Hi Linda,

I'm pleased to hear your rads are going ok and just one left to go that's great news and you must be relieved your almost done with everything now.

Times just flying at the moment and I'm still having an anxious wait for my results on 9th June.

It's also unfortunate that my surgery salpingo oophorectomy has been cancelled again with a provisional date of 5th August now but this may change again I have been told.

My breast surgery will inevitably be delayed further now because of this cancellation.

Sue how are you feeling after making your decision regarding not having the Cape? Don't torture yourself with what you decided. It was the best decision for you I feel in view of your circumstances.

Hope you are sleeping better now.

Mich, glad your rads are going well and Saftmom not long now until you finish yours too!

Davia and Claire hope you're ok too and anyone else I may have missed.

Stay strong ladies and keep safe

Karyn xxxx

Hiya Linda,

That's great...i've got 6 left after todays appointment but soo far so good...i expect the side effects will kick in afterwards as karyn's did...i may be better off than some as there's no boob to get warm lol :-)

Roll on monday eh, it will be here and gone before we know it....

Love to all and stay safe xxx

Hello Mich 8,

I so agree with you about sometimes not feeling ‘brave’. I was diagnosed in Oct 2019. Everyone was brilliant. I felt very supported but once my treatment stopped (Feb 2020) people appear to have forgotten I had breast cancer. I know that’s normal and in so many ways I know it’s fair enough. I can see exactly how it would be, we always tend to put other peoples traumas aside and move on. I am sure I give the impression that I have done that exact same thing!! 

Sadly though its not quite like that. The fear grabs me when I least expect it at times. Some days I feel death is imminent. It’s horrible and I find it so hard to talk about. I know it’s ok on here. People will read this and understand. 

Mostly I AM ok. I have a good life and have a lovely husband and good mates but some days I am almost immobilised by fear. It just gets a grip occasionally and I feel SO alone. For me I guess I wouldn’t describe it so much as low self worth but more an ‘emptiness’ that is resistant to being filled. 

Hoping all goes well for you and for anyone reading this. 

Stay safe everyone. 

Kebbs x x 

Hi ladies,

Kebbs, only ladies that have been through our ordeal know what it feels like. I finished my radiotheraphy in May and no more check ups apart from one last appointment with the Surgeon in August if it doesn't get cancelled. I too fell alone and scared even though I have a wonderful family and friends.

Mich, sorry your first radiotheraphy didn't go as planned. I found it a breeze after everything, I had a few delays with the machine breaking down, it happened 2 - 3 times. Yes Mich, I have the same feelings. I cry for no reason and worry that I won't be around for much longer. I think it's because the chemo didn't get all the tumor and I had a 16 mm tumor left which I don't think is good. The surgery did give me clear margins.

Karyn, only 3 days to wait for results! I'm sorry that your surgery has been delayed,its stress you really don't need.

I don't feel any better not having Cape although I don't think I could have made any other choice with the coronavirus as it is. I do worry though that because of this, the cancer could come back but it's something I have to learn to live with.

Carla and Linda, you are nearly at the end of your treatment. Just to let you know, I didn't get any side effects whilst having the R.T or afterwards.

Davia and Claire, how are you both getting on?

Sorry if I have missed anyone out.

Love to all,

Sue xxx

Hi Sue,

many thanks for replying. 

Just a quick question. Did you get a stiff/heavy feeling in your breast after radiotherapy?? Asking because I most definitely  have and it’s not improving 3 months on. 

Yes it’s a tough old journey. I can forget about cancer some days but it often lingers in the back of my head. Trying to just ‘get on’ and enjoy life (despite it all!!) but it’s not always easy is it? 

Go well. 

Kebbs x