Yep, this is definitely the club no one wants a membership card to! Thanks  for the encouraging words. 

All I can say, having only just joined here myself, is that I already know there are some very kind, thoughtful and knowledgable people on here. Sometimes, and it may depend on the individual, the sort of anonymity that forums provide can be welcome but other times I do know that you need a "real" person who can hug you and talk face to face.

When I've been in hospital I have seen a lot of posters up for various support groups so maybe give one of them a try? It may or may not suit but has to be worth trying.

Other than that, and sort of off topic, do we really deserve dogs? :)

Thanks Fhard, I'm definitely considering the support group thing. I'm lucky to live in London so I figure if I don't like the biscuits at one group, there'll be another to try.

I'm a bit put off by remembering the support groups in 'Fight Club'. But they're probably not like that irl :)

Best advice I can give at this point....if the only biscuits on offer are RichTea then look elsewhere! XX
But then I thought, you deserve more than a joke about biscuits.
Look, I DO have a wife and circle of friends but I also know not everybody has. As an example a lot have family but, and it's a long story, I have my wife and three daughters and, now three grandchildren but as regards my "original" family no.
Nobody should have to go through anything like this alone. That, to me, is self evident. I do have an opinion of your former BF who could only stay while things were easy but I think it's best I keep that to myself.
So, please, do try support groups. If the group seems good but the biscuits are crap then, well, take the support and if necessary smuggle in cake!

Just noticed I got automatically censored there. That's clever and will make me more careful in future. :)

Haha, actually I appreciated the biscuit joke. But thanks for your longer response too. 

Of all the forums to edit out swears eh? 

As for the BF, I'm really struggling to square the person I thought he was (loving, loyal and ultimately dependable) with the behaviour I'm seeing now. Can't help but think how I'd react if he was the one with a cancer diagnosis! 

It's really helpful to get other people's take on it. I'm starting to.think I'm just a bit too used to making excuses for him. But then worry I'm being too harsh. 

Sigh.