Hi Folks, I am new to this forum, but joined as I think that I may need some support in the times ahead. It is not me with Kidney Cancer, but my husband, who doesn’t want to talk about it.
Hi, I think sometimes when it comes to talking about cancer it's just too much, if you speak of it you have to admit it to yourself and accept it, if you don't it's almost as if you can ignore it for a while. If it were me I would say to him that I am here and I won't comment but just listen if he ever feels ready and wants to talk about it, if not then that's ok too. That way there's much less pressure and he may just surprise you and come to you when he feels the need to. Sam
I was diagnosed with kidney cancer a few months ago, i wanted to talk about but didnt know what to say, it all seemed so unreal so i didnt talk at all at first and turned in on myself. I am now happier to talk but my husband is horrified by it all and though he is a massive support and a great listener i know he is uncomfortable and worried about saying the wrong thing. I have found it easier to talk about my feelings with one or two people outside of the family, your husband may open up to someone else, please dont be upset if he does he is just protecting you. You dont say what the prognosis is and the course of action, surgery, chemo etc he is facing.
Hi Riggers, My husband had an immunity illness called Wegener Granumalosis about 15 years ago, he worked in a Lab for a company making pesticides to kill cockroaches etc. We think this illness, which is very rare came from this source. But by the time he developed it several years later he had long left the company. To prove it would have been expensive and he was very ill. This illness is life threatening. This is just to give you his background. However it attacks your organs one or more, the illness in his immunity system attacked his kidneys before the could give hid the necessary treatment. He has been in remission from this since. But has had Chronic kidney failure for the past 15yrs. He has always gone to see a kidney consultant a couple of times a year.
In October 2018, his kidney doctor decided to do a scan as part of that particular appointment. The result of the scan was a tumour in his left kidney. he has had two scans since, over a period of six months, the tumour remains stable, and contained within this kidney to this date ? My husband has never had any symptoms of cancer, and still does not have.
His consultant wants him to have the operation to remove the kidney sooner rather than later. As there is only this window in time now. My husband’s opinion is why should he have this surgery now, when he feels fit and well and has a good quality of life. If he had this surgery the consultant has told him that he will definetly need dialysis. As the other kidney would only be operating at about 8 on the scale. We have been to have a talk to the dialysis senior nurse. We go back to the consultant in July, He is awaiting my husbands answer. But he say’s it’s all about his quality of life, going out for a drink, a meal etc. I invite your comments on this or anyone else who would like to comment. As at present I feel in Limbo, my husband seems to be able to get on with his life having a drink, going out etc without stress, or it would appear to be that way.
