Jolamine, 

Thankyou for your reply. Yes my wife was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2016 had surgery, chemo and radio we were told the surgeon was confident he got everything although we know there’s no gaurentee. 

We have amazing family support so I know we are really lucky. I agree a positive outlook is best it got us through it last time x

Hi,

It sounds as if you have both been battling this for some time. As you rightly said, you place your trust in your surgeon and believe him when he is confident that everything had been removed.

I did the same, only to find that I had a second bout of breast cancer a year after the first, because he hadn't taken a wide enough margin. My first bout was 8 years ago and my second 7. When this was diagnosed, I had a really scary week waiting for results, as I have already lost both of my parents plus several relatives and close friends to cancer and, had convinced myself that I had metastases. Fortunately for me, it was another primary of the same type of cancer that I had initially been diagnosed with.

My mum has breast cancer for 12 years before she was diagnosed with secondary cancer in her liver, lungs, brain and bones. I nursed her at home until close to the end, when she needed more care than I could give her. I am so glad to hear that you have such amazing family support, because you will need this to cope with everything. Please accept any offers of help, no matter how small. Anything that takes some pressure off you, gives you more precious time to spend with your wife.

Remember, that if you fall ill due to stress, overwork or not getting enough sleep, you will be no good to anyone, so you have to look after yourself too. How is your wife coping with her diagnosis and how is her health at present?

There are many on this site who are living with a secondary diagnosis and have lived considerably longer than any prognosis given.

Here's hoping that your wife's treatment will help her to buy her a lot more time. It is a hard road that you are about to travel and, if I can help in any way, I'm always here for you.

Do please keep in touch and let us know how she gets on with her treatment.

Kind regards,

Jolamine