Hiya there, 

Dont worry im new to the chatting thing too, talking has never been a big thing for me but after my diagnosis I felt like it was needed, maybe like you. I'm really sorry to hear that about your diagnosis but on the other hand its fantastic you're fighting it with such strength! I was only disgnosed last year so I have no idea what its like to live with it for so long yet but the emotional impact I do, and for some reason the smack in the face is never expected or prepared for.

The scan scare I competely understand and there is no way of knowing what the outcome will be, which is so hard but its great to hear your strength is strongly intact, maybe taking someone along with you for support would be helpful? You say its expected of you to be stronger than those you are meant to tell, this is very noble but this must be exhausting for you, if it is all the time. I hope that you have someone that you can lean on, but we are here too. There are amazing people on here who can understand and try to help. 

Feeling good on any day is always good, and the positive outlook is definitely fantastic, my grandma fought cancer for so many years and she alwasy remained positive, sometimes I think that is hakf the battle of carrying on. Cancer changes alot of things but it only strengthens our will to live and thats amazing. I really hope your scan comes back all good!  

Bex 

Hello Lyons,

I have had a cancer diagnosis twice in the past 8 years. This has brought several unexpected situations and challenges along the way. The sad thing is that a cancer diagnosis doesn't just impinge on us. It hits family and friends head on as well. Your analogy of it hitting you in the face with a shovel is so accurate.

Both of my parents and several relatives and close friends have had cancer, so I have experienced this from both sides of the fence and I believe that I was more worried about my loved ones with my own diagnosis than I have been about myself. Now I feel guilty for causing my loved ones so much worry - we just cannot win!

I hope that your scan went well yesterday and that the news was good. Regardless of the outcome, I'm glad to hear that you are still up for the fight. We only get the one chance at life and we should live it to the full.

Thinking of you and praying for a good outcome.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi ya..

Scan was stable,So back to the hospital today for chemotherapy . I would like to say to you "It gets easier as time goes on!! . But I think you find different avenues to channel through. I find it easier but only because I've been dealing with it for so long now. You learn to put it to one side for that moment in time and carry on. Find that time in the day when your not too sick and do something even going out for a coffee or a walk round the shops? Just something different then you normally do.

All the best and keep looking forward. 

Hi. Thanks for reply

TOTALLY agree with you about the impact it has on others. My sense of humour is a little out there and i know it bothers people that I talk openly about it . That's my way of dealing with it. It's funny how it's me that has it, but I have to watch what I say, so I don't upset people .life of a cancer patient can be challenging in so many ways.

Keep smiling and looking forward 

Hi Lions,

I am so glad to hear that your scan was stable. How much chemo are you scheduled to have?

I also talk openly about my cancer journey and I find that this can embarrass some people. I have lymphoedema in both arms as a result of my double mastectomy. Many people ask what is wrong with them as they are always bandaged from fingertips to shoulder. When I say cancer, they don't know where to look or what to say.

I see this as a way of educating people about cancer. It is pointless staying quiet about it as we did in years gone by. With the number of people being touched by cancer these days, everyone should be aware of what it entails.

Stay strong.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx