Hi Furznick,

Life can be so cruel at times. You must feel totally devastated. I don’t know much about oesophageal cancer. I myself have had 2 bouts of breast cancer and am fortunate enough to still be here 8 years on. There are several people on this site who have oesophageal cancer and they are all at different stages of their cancer journey.

If you want to know how others are coping you can find them by going to the blue banner at the top of this page. If you click on the search facility and type in oesophageal cancer it will bring up previous posts on the subject.

I hope that you find this helpful.  Do please keep in touch and let us know how you are both getting on and remember that we are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Dear Furznick

i can only imagine how devastated you must be. My husband has recently been diagnosed with cancer and we don’t know if it’s serious or not at this stage but just the idea of him getting sick and dying is tearing my heart apart. I’m so sorry you are going through this grief. All we can do is love our partners as best we can while we have them. There’s lots of advice on here about taking care of yourself through this as being a carer is so tough. Make the most of people who can look after you over these next weeks, you’re going to need them. 

Thinking of you xx

Hi my husband had oesophageal cancer and died 6 weeks ago aged 46. He was diagnosed in February. We never got to the terminal stage - the tumour started to give off toxins which poisoned his body. I’m now left a widow at age 42 with an 8 and 3 year old to care for. I know it won’t be much comfort to you but from what I understand oesophageal cancer is one of the less treatable types of cancer and it seems that only a small number of people are cured of it. Me and my husband travelled from the midlands to London for treatment on Harley st and they couldn’t save him. I am also heartbroken and know exactly what you are going through xx

Dear Neverhappyagain,

I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Your poor husband was young to be taken so soon. It must be very daunting for you to be left with two young children at only 42. Yiou both obviously did all you could to save him and you must be absolutely devastated.

How are your children coping? Do you have family or friends who can you can confide in and receive support from?

Please remember that we are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi jolamine

I have a twin sister who I am really close to so she has been a big support to me all through this horrible journey. My 8 year old has been really brave and I’m so proud of her. The little one is due to start nursery this week and I’m concerned about him and I’m looking at getting some help for him through a local hospice and the school.  I’m concerned that he’s too young to understand where daddy has gone. He has attended each appointment with us in London and has sat on daddy’s lap whilst daddy had his chemo so I really don’t know what is going through his little head. I’ll make sure both kids get through this though. They are both such loving and happy children, I hate the fact that cancer has taken their daddy away from them. He was such a fantastic father and husband and his family was his life. Me and my husband both remained positive all through this journey never giving up until the day the oncologist said that he was dying and that he would die that day. I think being positive is the only way you can try to get through cancer. Xxx

Hi Neverhappyagain,

I am so glad to hear that you have a twin who you can turn to for support throughout all this.  Children are so resilient in this sort of situation. I presume that you will talk to them about their daddy and try to preserve the memory of him for both their sakes?. I agree that it will be difficult to assess the impact that this has had on both of them, but particularly on the 3 year old. I am glad to hear that you are seeking help for him through the local hospice and the school and I hope that this helps.

It seems so unfair to have their daddy taken away from them so soon. You sound like a very strong person yourself and I'm sure that you will do whatever is best for them.

I agree with you completely about having a positive take on cancer to get you through, although it's not always easy to maintain this outlook as the end draws near.

Thinking of you all.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx