I've just had the best holiday ever with my wife, son and family in Scotland. We were supposed to be there for two weeks but had to come back after one. I feel so happy.
About five weeks ago I went to the doctor to get ointment for an eruption of a hair follicle in my right armpit. She was concerned about a deep lump and sent me to the breast clinic to investigate. I was attended by a lovely team and other than the extremely long waiting room times it was a pleasant experience despite the nervous period between biopsies and report. Turned out to be a stage 3 melanoma and so I had to be referred across to the skin clinic. I received very quick attention due to the combined efforts of GP and breast clinic. They even sorted out by delaying appointments so that I could get away for the first week of my holiday. As my GP said, my melanoma boat had sailed. So now having had a few CT scans I am again waiting nervously for the report this Friday.
I do hope for the best possible outcome but am prepared for the worst. It will probably be something in-between.
So what has changed over the last two months? I feel that I have become a different person. I used to be a little bored with life and was a little ignored by friends and relatives. Suddenly I feel more alive and the sky seems bluer. However I am now a person with a label.
Maybe I will be different again after Friday.
The holiday was terrific for many reasons, weather, scenery, the place we stayed at, the closeness of family, the food and the wine. For many hours we sat and watched the harbour seals below.
A complexity of islets
Ranging from the shore
Is diminished by the tide.
Simplicity restored.
Grey seals' slumber ended,
Lumber over rocks then
Slip smoothly into sea.
Slapping and tumbling, my delight.
I spend a half hour thrilling
At their joyful plunging flights before
Returning reluctantly one last time
Up the log jammed lane
To the homely home of Old Suardal..
This will define my outstanding memory of this period and not cancer.
