My Dads Cancer breaks my heart

Hello All

I find it hard to find the words.

My Dad was diagnosed with lung cancer in October and it shook my world. We weren’t told what stage it was but it has come with so many complications, he also suffers from COPD. He was taken into hospital after having a heart attack and after an X-ray he was told he had lung cancer. We asked why it hadn’t been picked up 6 months earlier when he had had an x-ray with a suspected chest infection and was told they weren’t looking for it so that’s why it wasn’t picked up. They couldn’t do anything regarding the cancer due to the fact his heart was having issues where he was diagnosed with a pericardial infusion. After what seem like endless tests, stays in hospital  and months of waiting he finally started his treatment in January. After 4days he was re-admitted to hospital with sepsis and then he had to stay in hospital only coming home a week ago. They have suspended his chemotherapy for now as his body isn’t strong enough. He has lost weight dramatically and has to be on oxygen 24/7. Watching the most important man in my life go through this is the toughest thing ever and always wondering how much more can his body take. I never let on to him how hard I’m finding this.

Sorry for rambling I just thought maybe this would help me.

My partner lost her mum the day before New Year’s Eve from pneumonia so is there the best she can at present.

i just feel a little lost.

Thanks 

  • Hello KDJD.  You have come to the right place; this forum is made for people who have so many emotions tumbling around inside them that need to come out somewhere.  We have all found this; people understand - they have been there; nobody judges us.  Lots of "what ifs?" too.  So I was pleased to see you set out the story of your dad's illness so far and hope you have felt better for putting it down in writing.  I too have watched loved ones die from cancer and wondered if it could have been handled differently but eventually reached acceptance. 

    You are doing everything you can for your dad and it is hard to keep it together for his sake.  So don't give yourself too hard a time as you go through this.  You will manage because you love your dad and want to help him.  I hope you will come back from time to time and tell us how things are going.  Annie