Hi sorry to hear about your wife you don't say what your wife has.i have bowel and liver cancer and am awaiting to hear from hospital for news on operation or chemo or whatever they decide.it is very scary .my husband is also very scared and we talk a lot but he says he doesn't know what say to me because he wants help but not upset me .mine had been brilliant like I'm sure you have .it's horrible situation to be in and I can understand your wife's anxious about operation .I think I will relax bit when I know what's to happen however awful.we feel out of control and we ladies like to know what's going on .we went to McMillan for council ling session at beginning but nice man but couldn't help us .I would say keep talking to your wife .good luck 

Hi she has lobular  cancer stage 2. It's hormone triggered. She needs a mastectomy of the right breast. She is 50. I am 49 and our son is 9. He doesn't know anything yet. We hope to keep it from him as much as possible. I am trying to be there for her but I am saying things in good faith but I seem to upset her. She is worrying about everything and I am trying to tell her I will. My work have gave me the option to work from home after her surgery. Which is good. But we have 4 week before the operation and I don't know how to help her to get through that time. Sorry I forgot to say that I hope you are doing well and keep the faith. She has her faith and it helps but i am failing to be as good as she needs

Hi thankyou for reply .the worry and uncertainty is huge time and time again my husband says he dosnt know how im coping and cant imagine whats in my head .he wouldnt want to.but unfortunatly we just have to .youll prob know when its time to yell ypur son .i have 3 grandchildren and we havnt told them yet but ithink they hear us talking so need be bit more careful .i have friend whos beat breast cancer twice and made very good recovery .its good you can work from home .my husband semi retired and doesnt work winter months as hes gardenerso he will be home .your wife is young.so has that on her side as well .westill try go out do normal things as advised blah blah blah .good luck

Thanks for the comments at least I know we are not alone. Good luck to you too. 

Hi another quick post reread your reply.i don't think you are failing be as good as your wife needs .my husband admits he's scared of what future holds we been together 44 years .there is no right or wrong way no rule books .we tried councillor but don't think go again just keep talking bout same stuff then I couldn't sleep at all .good luck