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my mum has leukaemia, saying no to bone marrow transplant?

samraz01
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Hi all, I'm new here, I guess I have the courage now to reach now as I've had 3 months to take in that mum has Acute Lymphoblastic Leukaemia(ALL) 

Understandly it was a big hit to me and the family but we have been with her everyday and she is doing well with the usual side affects and is currently back at hospital going through intensification chemo.

The consultants want her to have a bone marrow transplant but she is really worried as well as myself and the family, far too many risks considering she is over 50. 

We know she will be very poorly throughout the transplant process considering the high doses of chemo she will also get but it's the thought of her getting grafts versus host disease and losing her, and even if it is successful the chances of the leukaemia coming back are still there so I see more cons than pro's in this and just all over the place I guess, I know we could lose her if she doesn't reach remission or she does and has a relapse but I don't want to put mum through something so horrible in which we could lose her and if not then still not much hope if it is successful.

I just wanted to know if there is anyone out there that opted not to have a transplant and how they are doing? and if I am just being silly thinking so much! 

Sam x

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    I know nothing, I was just dx with metastatic cancer, they thought leukemia or lymphoma, biopsy showed epithelial cells which ruled out blood cancer. Now just waiting to see what lights up on the PET scan. Had my port put in yesterday. I am 53 years old so I also am looking at a less toxic approach no matter what kind of cancer it turned out to be . I think you have to research quality of life , once your mom decides the quality of life that she is able to handle , then that will help make decisions on treatments clearer. Everybody is in a different situation , everybody has different opinions on what they desire . Some people are very strong and make decisions to fight with every ounce they have and they often do well . Some people make decisions for shorter time in exchange for less very sick days . Unfortunately, it is never predictable either way.  It will be your moms decision but the more information you can provide her the better . I admire you for researching this for her , she probably does not feel like doing it herself . My daughter is 34 and has been a great help even though she is grieving I think it helps her and me also for her to stay busy researching my options.

  • Offline in reply to Debbiem
    Thank you so much Debbiem, it means a lot, I guess mum and all of us believe it's not worth going through something that might do more harm then good, again you never know which way it can go with transplants it's all a risk, but she's been through enough. You seem like a very strong person, my heart goes out to you and your daughter, you will get through this x
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    Hi Sam, My dad was diagnosed with ALL's leukaemia in January 2016, he was 63. We knew it was incurable & at first he was offered a bone marrow transplant but they then said he couldn't have it. He was given two years if he responded well to chemo which at first he did, the bone marrow transplant could have really helped him if he hadn't already been too old. I know my dad would have taken it if offered, he was waiting for a port to be put in his head as the chemo in the spine was too painful for him & stage 2 was making him quite ill but he died suddenly at home in his sleep in march 2016. His docs, McMillan nurses & consultants all said it wasn't expected, it turned out to be a blood clot to his heart that caused it. I know my dad always said if the treatment made him ill he would stop but I know if the bone marrow could have helped he would have taken it. She might be poorly for a bit but if it works great! What has your mum said?
  • Offline in reply to Donb

    Hi Donb,

     

    Really sorry to hear about your dad, I'm taking my mums other conditions into consideration whilst making the decision with her about the bone marrow, her liver is not to great and has been acting up throughout chemo and the thought of what would happen during the transplant just scares all of us including mum. Mum is 53 and this transplant could be life threatening to her considering everything, and the fact that even if she makes it through there is still a chance of they leukemia reoccurring doesn't give much hope for us to go ahead with the transplant in the first place.

    I guess like Debbiem said, weighing up quality of life during the process so far and how mum feels should make the final decision. We all want to live our longest!

     

    Sam x

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