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History repeating itself :(

Smalliegirl
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Hello All

Back in 2008, I looked after my mum when she was diagnosed with terminal oesophageal cancer. It was 6 months of hospitals, machines and medications. I did my best and made her journey a little easier.

After she died, we managed to find my dad (they divorced in 1972 & we had no contact). On 28th May 2012, we met.  On 28th May 2017, we got told his prostate cancer is now life limiting. Not the anniversary of meeting we had hoped for.  We now have maany decisions to make.  He lives alone an hour away.  I've suggested he comes to live with me and we transfer his treatment and care to here.  Looks like history is about to repeat itself.  At least this time, we have time to get better prepared.

  • Hi Smalliegirl, 

    I have no doubt that your mum appreciated everything you did to make life easier for her during her cancer journey and I'm sure your dad will be just as grateful and feels very lucky to have you by his side.

    I can't begin to imagine how difficult this must be for you at the moment but I just wanted you to know you are not alone. Many members here have been in similar situations with their parents and loved ones and hopefully some of them will post soon to offer their support and advice. I'm not sure if you are aware of this already but I have included some information that I have found on our website about what support is available to those caring for family members at home. To find out more just click here. 

    Best wishes to you both, 

    Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator

  • Offline in reply to Moderator Steph
    Thanks :) Well, there has been a major development. My Dad had massive blood loss on Monday night and had to be resuscitated. I've had a chat with the Dr and his condition has gone down hill so quickly that they believe we're now looking at weeks. Yesterday, he didn't know who I was. Today he was quite lucid and had a chat and a laugh. He did, however, completely avoid the subject of cancer when the palliative care team came to speak to him. He has no will, so we are trying to get a solicitor to the hospital at short notice for him to make one and have a Dr declare that he is competent to do so. Crazy times!
  • in reply to Smalliegirl

    I'm so sorry to hear that Smalliegirl. How is your dad at the moment? Have you managed to get a solicitor to the hospital? I hope you have managed to get the go ahead  from the doctor for him to make a will.

    Remember that we are here when you need us so do stay in touch when you can.

    Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator

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