my dad was diognsed last oct 2016 with terminal cancer ( rectal cancer that had spread to liver & lungs) over xmas my mum suddenly passed away from an illness COPD, this hit me, my sister & specially my dad very hard as although they knew he would never get better she was his rock & was going to help him get through the hard times, he had a spell of radiotherapy then chemo which started the day before xmas, he hasnt been too bad with the chemo but a few weeks ago had his routine ct scan to see how the chemo had worked & it hasnt done anything & his cancer has spread, more spots on liver more spots on lungs & a darker shaded area, also spread to his adrenal gland & into his bones ( pelvic bone & spine) although he doesnt have many symptoms of it spreading as such, he has over the past week been short of breath & finds he cannot do much at all which he finds hard as he always been an active person & the fact he cannot go out n about is hard as he finds it passes the time away & being stuck in home is driving him mad, he was even admitted to hospital the other day due to being short of breath but after blood tests & a chest xray they couldnt find why he was short of breath & he has now put it down to his lung cancer, he doesnt eat much now as he says everything tastes like cardboard due to him losing his taste & he has his appointment this thursday with his cancer doctor & has said he is going to ask if his breathlessness is down to his lung caancer & if it is he wants to stop the chemo & have some quality of life instead of quantity, this i totally understand but i just dont know what things will be like for him from now on & what to expect near the end, i have a supportive husband & 4 young children age 4 to 10, i have my sister too but she lives an hour away so at the minute alot of help is down to me which im fine about as i know when the time comes my sister will be around to help, im also worried his cancer may have spread further to his brain as he is getting a bit forgetful, like when he is talking he is forgetting what he was going to say & also forgetting what people have said or confused over what people have said, he also knows he is getting forgetful as he has said this himself, i just dont know how i will cope losing both parents in a short space of time, we have always been very close & losing my mum hit me very hard which im still nowhere near getting over it & struggle every day, some days i dont know if im coming or going, my mum has always been on my mind & i have my dad on my mind 24/7 & dont feel i can relax.
