Hi Bridget you have all as a family been through a lot. I have just found out my husband has throat cancer and I am so scared, I keep trying to stay positive but I am wondering has it spread and what stage it is at. On top of that my mom might have lung cancer. I am lucky to have stumbled across this site early we are still waiting to see the consultant. I have to be brave but I do not feel it Spidwid x

Thanks for replying , I'm sorry to hear about your husband, and mother, it will be very hard to stay positive at this early stage, however take each day as it comes, no one will judge you if you have quite a few wobbles at the minuite, we have found rather than dwell on the things we can no longer do as a family we have made a new normal, over the last year we have made lots of changes.  I try wherever possible to keep control over the appointments, obviously as a child out son has lots of outside agency's involved with his care, very quickly we had 'Julie from ..... ' or Cath from..... At this time or this day it became overwhelming, a diary became extremely useful, we called a meeting round the table as you would say and got everyone involved and soon found we didn't need everyone as lots of people over lapped each other.  That done although hospital visits, home visits, operations all must be done don't let them define your life, find time In between to do something nice, on appointment days at Queens Medical Centre in Nottingham because we travel from Lincoln we like to have lunch out either before or after. anyway stay in touch and I'm sure you'll do better than you ever thought you could take care x