Hi Es,

I can really resonate with your post for I lost my 93 year old father to prostate cancer and old age about this time last years. He lived in Canada while I live in the south of England so I do understand how you feel. I.  couldnt get out to see him or support my sisters and brothers ecept over the phone as my wife has health problems and I couldnt leave her.

The short answer to your question is no one really can tell. My father had been in and out of hospital for the last three years of his life. Several times the family were told to prepare for the worst but my father was such a determined fighter and kept proving the medics wrong. He wasnt going to go untill he was good and ready. I am so proud of his fighting spirit, he gave the cancer a heck of a fight.

I wish I could be more help as I know how I felt not being there. Please keep in contact and am sending kind thoughts your way, Brian.

Hi Emily,

My dad was a Canadian who lied about his age to get in the Candian army (He was officially too young to join) He met my mother when he was over here and married her before going to the war Italy. My wife pushed me into finding him about 25 years ago and having thought I was an only child, found I had three sisters and two brother in Canada.

A year after finding him we went out to visit him and we were so alike; same likes and dislike and nannerisuims. When he was driving us through Calgary one day my wife had just said you two are so alike, you walk the same and even talk the same. My dad had a country music radio station on and the very next song had the words, I walk the way he walk, I even talk the way he talks.My hiar stood on end, it was just as if the song ahd been written for me as other words were also like me and dad. My sister had it played at his funeral which I wish I could have attended.

My sister said he was a very stubborn man and allthough we only met for just that month, we are in some ways like two peas in a pod, much more so than my other two brothers.

We were hoping he would make it to Christmas but it just wasnt meant to be. I also lost my mother just after christmas about ten years ago so not a good time of the year for me. I have also had prostate cancer but luckily have made a good recovery.

Wish you and your father all the very best, Brian.

Hi Brian,

What a story - and how amazing to find out you were so alike!

Losing parents is such a difficult thing - my parents were both only children, so there's no extended family - just the four of us and my mum (who is approaching 80).

I suspect it's going to be a difficult Christmas for us too. I can't imagine how you must feel losing both mum and dad at this time of year.

Thoughts are with you.

Emily

Hi Emily,

The story didnt end there for before meeting my dad in Canada, My mother told me she'd had to have a sister I knew nothing about,  adopted as she had to go into hospital for a very serious operation and culdnt take my younger sister with her. My grandparent looked after me but it was during the last part of the war and they couldnt look after my sister as well. So she'd had her adopted; something she had always regreted.

Anyway after coming back from Canada I debated for weeks wither to try and find my sister. One morning I woke up and my mind was made up. I did eventually find her a few months later and to see her and my mother reunited after so many years was tear jearking moment for me. They were so alike; even the same wedding dress's and hairstyles. I also have found me and my sister are so alike, both liking the same things and even have the same zaney sense of humour our mother had.

Thanks for the kind thoughts, Brian.

Hello,

I know how you feel it's really hard but don't give up hope he is still here but I do feel the same my dad was given a year to live with secondary lung and bone cancer. He got a kidney infection and lost a lot of blood and now needs oxygen and has no energy to move. It's awful to see him so different and we don't get any new answers as often as we would like. Fortunately I live near by but it's difficult regardless. Christmas is a good goal perhaps have one early? I think we might. 

Thank you ... I just heard he is now losing interest in food - which suggests to me it is coming sooner rather than later.

Cancer is so so awful - I had no idea until now, seeing my dad go through it. :(

Thanks Katie27 - that sounds like a great idea - although not possible for me - I have no leave left, but a public holiday at the end of November. I was planning to go again, but now they are saying he probably won't make it that long. 

I hope you enjoy your early Christmas with your dad, if you do it. 

xx