Hello all, I am new here so I guess I will start with my story.  My Husband (Terry) my soulmate, friend, my everything has stage 4 Non small cell Squamous Cell Carcinoma of an unknown primary.  June 2014 our son called me and said "Mom you need to come get Dad off the job, he just passed out"  What?  He is NEVER sick, immune system like nothing I have ever seen.  When I arrived, 2 men helped him to my car, he was pale as a sheet and was having a hard time breathing and swallowing.  Off to the Hospital we went.  After several test & Dr's we were told he had a Hiatal Hernia and the acid was effecting the nerve next to the esophogus.  This was causing him to pass out.  Meds were givin & I worked on his diet.  Food had to be almost purified for him to swallow.  Suddenly he lost his voice.  ENT found his vocal cord was paralyzed, why?  A CT of the chest was ordered, and there it was....a tumor in his upper chest....15 cm and wrapped around his wind pipe, arteries, esophagus, and nerves.  It damaged a nerve that controlled the left vocal cord.  Byopsy was done and yes ma'am your husband has Cancer.  Do you have an Oncologist?  My head was spinning!!!  One was recommended, a petscan was done and another tumor was found in the abdomen area.  By the end of September 2014 treatment had began.  Oh did I mention I was working on our Daughter's wedding during all this??  Yep she was married Sept 13, 2014.  I am so ANGRY, he is only 55!!  We had plans!!  He went through radiation and chemo and the tumors shrank.  The chest tumor went down to 2cm and the abdomen tumor 4cm.  Oncologist decided this was all that could be done for now.  Feb 2015 treatment stopped.  He was told to LIVE ride your motorcycle, go mud riding on side by side, take a trip, LIVE!!  He is more of a homebody so we did camp and mud ride.  He did ride his motorcycle when he felt strong enough.  In August another petscan was done, it's back!!  Nodule in lung, Oncologist is saying 2 good yrs left.  He is doing treatment again and is told this will continue indefinetly.  I do not know life without him.  We have been married for 35 yrs and he is all I know.  I find myself thinking of what I will do with myself once he is gone....nothing seems right!!  I AM SO ANGRY!!!!!