Hi Cathy and welcome to the forum.  I am not surprised to hear that you are not coping well - my goodness, how you get your mind around what you are all going through is beyond my comprehension.  I have incurable disease which is difficult to deal with but when its your children involved, I can only imagine how terrifying that must be and my heart goes out to you and your family.

I had targeted radiotherapy in February for a tumour in my brain (secondary disease in my case) and I just wanted to say that it has helped enormously so please keep hope.  It may help you to meet others in your situation if you type in a subject in the 'search forum' area on the purple strip at the top of this page. Hopefully other threads should pop up and you can post on recent discussions if there are any relevant to you.  The nurses here are also a massive support and if you ever need them their number is shown at the bottom of the page.

Cathy, I wish there was something profound I could say that would take your fears away but we both know as Mums that where our children are concerned our protective instincts know no bounds.  All I can say is that I hope others will come along and offer you support - I have made some lovely friends here and hope you do too. Please keep in touch and let us know how your son is doing and take good care of yourself too. Sometimes it just helps to write feelings down and get them off your chest - so feel free to rant when needed!!  Much love x