Hi Ell ...... welcome to the forum and i am so pleased for you that your treatment has finished and life is returning to its 'new normal'.  I am rubbish at computer-type things and tried to put you a link to When the Treatment Finishes .... then what? by Doctor Peter Harvey.  However, I couldnt work it out, but suggest you google it.  Its an article he wrote which he read at a seminar and is really really helpful (only a few pages long).  Maybe print it out and read it when you are having your 'heavy' days.

There are many here who understand your feelings so please come and chat when needed.  I have made some lovely friends here and hope you do too.  xx

Hi, thanks for the reply and info. I'm new to this so I'll try and check out the link you've kindly shared. Sounds like you've had a hell of a journey but nice to hear you're trying to keep your chin up as much as you possibly can. A fighter I think. You're an ineration. 

Sounds like you live for your family too. That's the bit I'm finding scary. You've probably gone through all these early fears I'm discovering that just won't shift. Life feels so unfair at times. But then I look at the news and see people's lives end with the click of a finger 

Your so very kind bringing me into something unknown that I'm not sure where it will even take me xxxxxxx

I'm guessing you're a dog lover too. I have two little bichons that have been right by my side. X