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Philip died in April and i feel sad all the time. I relive the day he died and the build up to that day. I try to visualise each moment and it is almost like i want it to happen all over again. I go over and over the days before the hospital appointments and keep returning to the what if and if only questions.I feel so alone just want to be with him, see him touch him and talk to him. Is this normal.

  • Hello Chuff, welcome to the forum, but sorry that you are grieving the loss of your loved one due to cancer. I have not experienced the same loss, but certainly have lost many loved ones to cancer, and I have cancer myself. I see you haven't received any replies to your post and I thought I would reply to have your post bumped up to the first page where hopefully, someone in a similiar situation as yours will see it and repond. People on this forum are very caring and supportive and you will find great support and understanding here. Come back on the forum anytime and tell us more about your loss and how you are coping.

    Sending you hugs. Take care.

    Lorraine

  • Hi, Chuff, I am so sorry for your loss.  It has been such a short while and you must give yourself time.  I know when my husband died I used to drive to the hospital and sit outside the window of the room he was in and this went on for some time.  I made myself believe he was still there.  We all deal with things in our own way and you will, given time, slowly learn how to live with your loss.  Is it normal?  Absolutely.  Even now, many years after my husband died I still would give anything to have him back.  

    Come and talk to us anytime,it does help, and we do understand. xI

  • I lost my lovely hubby Roy July 3rd. I have gone through so many emotions which I know is normal. I cannot beleive the emptiness that I am feeling. I can't even do everyday things without crying or just sitting down. I seem to want to sleep all the while which is not like me at all.  Roy never complained even after 24 sessions of chemo was always more concerned about myself and the kids and everybody that looked after him which he always called The Team. I know what we are going through is normal, but it is very new to us. Write any time and I will write to you, love Jilly Bean

  • Hi Chuff

    Welcome to the forum but sad to read the reason for you joining us.  I lost my husband in January this year and it certrainly takes time to cope with the loss so I would say what you are feeling is not at all unusual. We all deal with grief in different ways and I wondered in those ealy days how I would manage. We had been together for 42 years (37 married) and suddenly I had to face things differently.  This forum has been a great help as there are many understanding people in this virtual world and writing how I felt also helped me move forward step by step. My children and grandcchildren and friends are all coming to terms with our loss too but we are helping each other and when I have a wobble I know its a necessary response to having lost my lovely man. Time does heal, its gets a little easier day by day and I carry good memories in my heart though can still remember the last hours quite vividly I try not too dwell there too long.

    Come and chat anytime.  Jules

  • Hi Chuf

    I am sorry to here of your pain. All I can say is that if you are not normal neither am I. I lost my husband June fourth. And the feelings are real and cripling. Iam scared, lonely anxious, you name it. Ive started reading and listening to Eckhart Tolle and it has helped me to cope some, maybe it can help you. 

    Angela