I know I try my best to control my emotions in front of my dad as I dont want to upset him , I am trying my best to hold the tears back even though it hurts so much inside and not being able to cure him..i too do everything he asks for even though he dont really ask for anything. His needs come first.  It's a hard as my mum and dad divorced so he lives on his own I obviously go every day to help him keep him.company but he looks tired and wants to sleep alot , having trouble with appetite although he does eat little and often. Los alot of weight. I absolutely feel for you you done so well looking after him and you did your best . May I also ask at the time he was diagnosed was he at stage 4 ? and was it the same as my dad diagnosis mesothelioma sarcomatoid (I think the doctors said it's a mixture of 2 cancer cells - sarcomatoid) 

Thanks xx 

Hi

Yes considered stage 4 though with my husband's diagnosis of Pleural Mesothelioma this was contained to within the lining of his lungs where the cancer just kept growing. Weight loss was continuous in the time following chemotherapy.  Little and often food is good and the higher in calories the better.  His dietician recommended double cream, chocolate and basicially everything that probably would not normally be recommended to try and give him strength. He also had a couple of courses of steroids to help boost appetite during certain periods of his illness but in the end cancer won.

Emotional havoc is the best way to describe our feelings along with frustration and anger than nothing we could do could change the outcome.....all perfectly understandable with hindsight.  Cried alone and with my husband we also tried to control this as best we could.

Must be very hard as  your Dad lives alone.  It is hard to find balance of time and keep yourself well so that you can cope but we asked for all the help when we needed extra support. Jules

Laura, your GP can prescribe some build up drinks called Ensure.  They come in fruit flavours or savoury like chicken.  My mum used to make some mash and chicken and mix it up with the chicken flavour.  Its highly calorific and help keep his strength up xxxx

I am sorry to hear about your dad. My dads is pleura mesothelioma but his cells are called sarcomatoid. I believe it's the same as its cancer of the lining of the lung? May I ask you what was his symptoms at the time of diagnosis and in those.4 months? Sorry if I ask too much. 

Can we refer ourselves to clinical trials? We are awaiting chemo at the moment. 

Thank you 

Hi Laura, my dad had been feeling breathless which got steadily worse, loss of appetite and weight loss. When he got sent for a chest X-ray his left lung was filled with fluid. At first they thought it was pneumonia but on closer examination they found tumours on his lungs. My dad worked with asbestos as an electrical apprentice in the 1960’s early 1970s. How about your dad? 

Yes he has concetrator at home to help him breathe but he doesn't use it constantly only when he feels he needs it. 

They did found fluid thickening of the lining on the lung as well as they said it spreaded to opposite lung  ,but he feels not very bad so I believe it's a good sign . He also worked with asbestos about 30 years ago

 Thanks 

Hi 

I am very sorry to hear about your Dad. My Dad has been diagnosed with pleural Mesothelioma. About a month ago now. I completely relate to everything you are feeling. It has completely turned our lives upside down.

I hate seeing my Mum and Dad suffer like this and he is so scared and keeps saying he is not ready to die.

It is completely heartbreaking. Dad has deteriorated quite a bit in the last month and I’m so scared for what is ahead. 

Nothing you are feeling is unusual - I am feeling the same too.

Sending you virtual strength.

Hello thanks for replying 

May I ask what is your fathers symptoms? And what stage is he considered at ? As my dad diagnosis is mesothelioma sarcomatoid (cell type ) according to doctors aggressive one. What about your dad ?

We are awaiting chemo but onclogist says that only little precent that it will help slow down the beast,  as in his case surgery is not an option. 

Thank you for the hug much needed 

Same to you

Hello HSKerrit. I’m terribly sorry this horrible disease has struck again. Life can be so cruel. My dad struggled with his emotions during his illness. He was never one for big displays of affection. He cried a few times. I tried not to cry in front of him but I just couldn’t help it. Use the time you have to spend quality time together and tell each other how much you love them.  If you have any questions let me know xx