Hi Jack

Fingers crossed for 17th.

As to your wife wanting to go shopping I would say if she feels ok then fine.  The more normality she can get will help her to feel better which has got to be a good thing.

I am pleased that my story is heartening to some and to you.  I was surprised (as I think was the consultant) at how effective the treatment has been.  It may be that the drug trial I am on has helped.

I think that there is a bit of denial in all of us until we hear those actual words from the consultant.  Unfortunately that does not stop your imagination going into orverdrive.  The early hours of the morning are the worst.  As I mentioned before do not google anything as it will only depress you as they rarely seem to post anything good or positive.

Best wishes.

Gill

Just back from hospital - I'm delighted, she's devastated...

Histology results have all come back clear, the surgery was a success, and to all intents and purposes, she is "cancer-free"...

She is ER positive, so drugs will be prescribed for that. Something was stated as negative - can't recall what that was, but the positive/negative combination was apparently pretty good...

Largest tumour they found was 15mm, but there were several smaller ones dotted around.

Due do this scattering of smaller tumours, chemotherapy has been recommended. She is very unhappy about this, and does not want to do it, but I know that if there is the slightest chance that doing so will extend her time with her family then she will do it.

They didn't push the chemo angle - it is simply a belt and braces approach and the strongest recommendation was that she should at least have the conversation with the oncologist in a few weeks.

She asked me what I thought she should do if he gives a benefit percentage of less than 5% - I couldn't say. If I say don't, and it comes back, it will be my fault...

They have advised us to cancel our holiday in August - but by the same token don't really seem to be urging the chemo... is it necessary to start it right away? Couldn't it wait four months? Is it life or death? What are the risks if we delay by 16 weeks?

She is worried about the financial aspect of being off work if the chemo lays her low - she is worried about a lot of things.

She was calmer when I left for work.

I know it might be hard for her, but I still cannot get over the relief I feel that the op was a resounding success.

I suppose it's another journey now.

Hi Jack

So glad to hear the news.  It is always difficult to take in everything they tell you.

As to chemo if it is something they suggest then I would seriously consider it.  My chemo was not half as bad as expected.  Have had five treatments and only one more to go.  Only sign of disease left aftter 4 chemos was one slightly enlarged node under my right arm.  Consultant was not sure if this is actually related to the disease.

I was advised not to work during chemo as there is a much increased risk of catching what would normally be a minor ailment (like a cold) which can become more serious.  I know when my sister had chemo for breast cancer she caught a cold.  Luckily it was nothing too bad but there was a risk her next chemo would have been delayed which would have then delayed subsequent treatments and dragged everything on for even longer.

I finished work on 14 Jan and plan to go back on 02 June.  Was advised to give it a good four weeks from last chemo which is for 29 April.  Usually I feel a bit rough for a couple of days after treatment and not up to much for a week or so but as the treatments have gone one my body has got used to the drugs and after last one was just a couple of days when I was tired and appetite was not very good.  I will start back on a part time basis to build up as having done very little since 14 Jan I will no doubt get very tired to begin with.

Do let us know once you have spoken to oncologist and see what they advise.  If it were me I would go with chemo to nuke the little buggers completely.

Very best wishes.

Gill

Hi Jack

I'm so glad that things are finally going your way and that you have the good news we all long to hear.

I have to agree, I'd go for the Chemo option too, I had 1 session before being switched to radiotherapy.

It wasn't too bad.

I was worried about losing my hair I was ver attached to it and it had taken 7 years to grow to the length it was, however, I love my new "rock" look, I got used to it very quickly. If not there are some great scarves and wigs.

I'm having a hind quarter operation a week tomorrow so losing hair is nothing compared to that!

Good luck in making your decisions.

Dor xx

Unless the oncologist is extremely firm in saying that chemo is NOT an option, then she will take it, absolutely without doubt, no questions whatsoever. The alternative is not to be considered...

It is just difficult to get your head around.. This is a treatment that necessitates six months of her going through the mill, for something that may or may not work, for a condition she may or may not have, and with an outcome that no-one can be sure of...

We understand the rationale. She has no problem with this. If it will extend her time with her family than that is all that matters.

The surgeon said if it had been one lump there would have been no discussion even about chemo, but the fact that the tumours were small and in different locations gave them cause to consider. The other breast was completely cancer-free, the lymph nodes were completely cancer-free. He said himself that as far as he was concerned, she is cancer-free.

I appreciate her sacrifice, and I know why she is doing it. She is so brave for doing this. She is not looking forward to any of it and fully expects it to be awful but she still intends going though with a treatment that has only been hinted at.

I'll let you know how it goes.

If it helps to get your head round this, then perhaps ask for more info on both stage and grade of the cancer, as well as clarifying the type of breast cancer.  Whatever, it seems it is not contained to a single tumour so that sends alarm bells ringing that it WAS doing its best to spread.  It also means that the level of confidence in being able to cut it out completely, unless all tumours were found and were well-defined and removed with margins, cannot be 100%.  Also at the moment there is little assurance on whether there are any active cancer cells remaining (Max has advised us elsewhere on this site of a blood test that can be done).  In my book, this is certainly not something to busk about with on the basis of the information you have, and your wife has accepted that she'll need to do it. Of course you'll never know whether this insurance was really needed but that is a bit like the decisions faced by BRCA gene carriers on whether and when to have preventative surgery. This is worth doing because the challenge in dealing with cancer after it has been able to take hold is immense and even more life-threatening.

Adjuvant chemo is usually effective, and then for more belt and braces the hormonal drugs would usually follow. I hope it goes well for her.

Hi Jack

Glad to hear that your wife will do chemo if advised by oncolcogist.  Given there were a number of tumors I think this is the most sensible option.  Whilste chemo is not particularly pleasant it has not been as bad as I expected.  It may be that I have been lucky in this.  They say the first treatment knocks you for six because your body is not used to it.  That 2 3 and sometimes 4 are ok but that there is a cumulative effect for 5 and 6 which makes them hard going.  For my part I was almost on eggshells after my first treatment expecting to feel awful at any moment.  In fact apart from a few off days it was not that bad.  Since then the pattern has been pretty similar in that apart from a few off days during each cycle I have been fine.  I have only one more to go next week.

Dop hope everything goes well and do let us now how she is doing.

Gill

Don't know much about stage... but cells are grade 2. Lobular cancer, so a steady growth of a type that is inclined to spread.

We are under no illusions as to what may be lurking around. We share the cancer team's concern that, despite the apparent success of the operation and the 'cancer-free' declaration, there may well be inactive cancer cells elsewhere just waiting to burst into life. We appreciate that chemo will (or should) render these as harmless as possible.

I would just like to know whether to cancel the holiday or not. The truth is that with her off work, we could do with the cash back in the bank account. We haven't heard anything yet from the oncologist. Given that if we start it afterwards, if that is even an option we can exercise, will she be more at risk of infection over the winter?

I would like to have the holiday first, but I'm not actually bothered too much.

We would just like a summer without any drama for a change. After smashing myself to bits in May 2011, I was made redundant in April 2012, then again in June 2013. The last two years have seen our finances squeezed somewhat since it has taken a few months in between to find another job. We have never claimed anything - wouldn't know how to if I'm honest - so we thought that this year we might start to fill the hole in the bank account and maybe even get it back up to zero...

Now this has come along and slapped us across the kisser - if it isn't pain it's poverty and if it isn't either it's both...

We have come through it all together and will get through this together as well, but it would be nice to just have one year or even one summer without her having to go through any more crap - just one year where we can share some nice stuff and be happy and relaxed.

Ah well...

Everyone has problems eh...

I'll keep you all posted

Hi Jacksnakes

I can appreciate your concern over whether to cancel your holiday or not. If it helps, you could call our nurse team on: 0808 800 4040 from Monday to Friday, 9am to 5pm. They will be able to advise you about this. Calls are free from UK landlines and most mobile phones.

Also, I know you say that you've never claimed benefits before, but again the nurses could let you know what you would be entitled to if you decided to go down this route. I'm sending you a link to our page on this subject in case it's helpful to you.

Best wishes to you and your wife.

Jane

Hi Jack

To be honest I think I would cancel the holiday and get a letter from the oncolcogist connfirming diagnosis and treatment plan.  I think you would have great difficutly with insurance if you go on holiday without informing the insurer of the diagnosis and this may not be covered.  Worth thinkg about.

With regard to money it is worth calling the helpline although the only help we would have got was a smal reduction in council tax but given that my husband has been working overtime to make up the shortfall in my salary we were over the limite to claim even this.  Have to say I have been suprised at the lack of financial help available.  My sister had breast cancer over two years ago and she was paid only statutorty sick pay for all but two weeks of her time off sick and there was nothing she could claim.

Sorry not to be of more help but thought it best to warn you.

Let us know how you get on.

Gill