Hello, so sorry for your diagnosis, and yes, lots of us on here know EXACTLY how you are feeling.  It's a huge shock isn't it?  To actually be told that you have the big C.  What I would say is this:  Don't try to carry this load on your own......if you want to cry, then cry, and if you want to talk about it, then talk about it.  Let your family be there for you, as I  am sure they want to do everything to lighten the weight from your shoulders.  I wish you the best of luck in fighting this monster and my prayers are with you, xx

Blue Girl hi  I felt the same as you in shock I couldn’t believe I had the big c word. I was told straight away I had a colonoscopy and they told me there and then I had a large tumour in my bowel  I didn’t know what or how I was feeling. like you I thought it was internal piles but never cancer. I still feel down about it but just have to get on with it. I’m waiting for operation to remove it  consultant says he can do it through keyhole surgery  my cancer is just in the bowel it as not spread. It’s gone through two of the bowel wall but not yet the third part of the bowel wall so hoping it wont be too long to be on the road to recovery.  I still feel down and empty at times but I keep trying to think positive.  If you need to cry then cry  scream even if you need to but don’t hold it in. I’m here if you need to vent   All the best to you x

Thank you so much for your kind words, I appreciate it.  I am now terminal.  Two years ago I was told that I had about a year to live, but I am still here, even though I am getting weaker and less able to do things.  I have been house-bound for quite a while, and to be honest, and I know this is an awful thing to say........I just wish it was all over with.  It's not that I feel sorry for myself.......honestly, I don't.......it's just that I kind of feel like I have had enough, and I am ready to leave this life.  Like I said, I guess it is an awful thing to say, but it's how I feel.  xx

Blue girl. I am so very sorry your terminal and your feeling the way you do  have you got any close friends or family. Surely your not doing this alone  you need people who care and love you around you  don’t really know what to say as it’s awful how you are feeling   All I can say is I’m here if you need to talk if it helps  lots of love to you xx

Morning everyone. Thank you for your replies and support. Waiting for my MRI and biopsy results. It’s the waiting that’s hard.

BlueGirl I am thinking of you. I hope you have family close by.

TangoPotter I also was told straight after colonoscopy. As I say with my symptoms I thought I had colitis. Was busy thinking last week well I’ll get a diagnosis and then pills/ prescription and then I’ll be getting on with my life….

i am just trying to navigate this new situation every day at the moment. Keep in touch both of you xx

Thank you, and yes, I have my family with me, which I am so grateful for..........I know that there are folks who are going through this alone, and it must be absolutely horrendous for them.  Coming here to this cancer forum helps me a bit, because I know that the people on here are going through (or have been through) the same thing as me, and it helps to know that I am not alone in this nightmare.  Once again, thank you so much for your kind words, xx

Thank you so much, you are in my thoughts and prayers, keep us informed, xx