Two loved ones diagnosed at the same time.

Hi, since Xmas I have found out both my Dad and my husband have inoperable cancer. My Dad is 85, has told all the family and he's receiving palliative radiotherapy. My husband is 75 and has decided against any treatment. He is currently feeling physically very well. He wants to keep it between us until it becomes obvious there's something wrong. I'm not sure how I feel about it all to be honest. 

  • Hi Grasshopper2,

    Oh poor you that's so sad - having both your dad and husband being diagnosed with inoperable cancer and all this happening in the last month. I am so sorry you are having to go through this and it's normal that you are feeling a little bit numb at the moment. Having two loved ones diagnosed at the same time must be double the shock and it's not easy to process all this and there is no right or wrong way to deal with this terribly sad news. It sounds like whilst they both have inoperable cancer, they have made very different decisions, your dad deciding to have palliative radiotherapy and telling all the family while your husband has decided against any treatment and prefers to keep it between the two of you. All you can do really is be supportive with them and be there for them. 

    I am glad that despite all this, your husband is currently feeling very well physically and I hope that this will be the case for as long as possible. It's so sad that cancer has simultaneously disrupted the lives of two people you love so much and therefore is also having an effect on your life.  I just wanted you to know that the forum is there for you anytime you feel the need to reach out to others who understand what you are going through. 

    We're thinking of you during this tough time - what a month it has been for you. 

    Best wishes, 

    Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator