hi kimima, So sorry to here you going through so much stress and sleepless nights, I to have this issue not sleeping as soon as i go to bed all i see is the word cancer , im also on morphine , i was put on diazapam to try and relax me it didn't work, i began finding things to do around my home, nothing i did could make me forget i had cancer i wouldn't talk to my partner about or anyone else, But two thing did help me to cope, I started doing a Journal ever single day writing what i was think ,how id cope, how id put on a brave face for my partner,how else could i deal with cancer. Before i knew i started feeling alot better about myself, i guess i was in denial for weeks on end. after  2/3 weeks i  began to sleep better than i was like yourself,. About the morphine i was taking that up to 4/5 times a day, then on one night i didn't take the morphine late at night it was around 7.30 pm that's when i first got a good nights sleep, so i did the same the following night it worked and for the third night it worked so i stuck to that rota, i'm still on morphine but refuse to take it after 7.30 pm. I genuinely hope this brings you some help and i hope you get a good night's sleep but please try not to take it after 7.30 pm ,like i said i found out it would keep me awake also that's why i changed my time's, maybe also start a journal write hoe you feel how your coping ect...if your symptoms continue ask your gp for a sleeping pill i find amitriptyline work wonders for me along with not taking the morphine late at night.  I hope this help's you in some way, and you get that rest you so badly need. I know it's not easy , i to went through sleepless nights , i think its our  brtasins working over time with the thought of having cancer, but please get in touch with your dr.  I hope all goes well for you ill keep my fingers crossed for you , if this helps one person i'm glad. TAKE GREAT CARE  KIMIMA

Lee10 x

Good morning Lee10. Thank you so much for taking the time to reply. I've been in touch with my Doctor and have some new pain relief that I started on yesterday, Pregabalin. I also have amitriptyline which I tried last night. The pain still woke me up, but the sleeping pill helped me to get back to sleep sooner. I'm definitely going to try your suggestion of no morphine after 7.30pm. 

I used to journal, pre cancer, but I find it difficult to do now. It's like I'm editing what I write because I know my 2 grown up kids will read it when I've gone. But maybe I should do it anyway.

A massive THANK YOU to you, you really have helped. 

With love, K.

Hi Kimima, im so please you read my reply, i know exactly where your coming from as broke my spine yrs ago, hens the reason im on morphine i to was like a night owl, The good thing is there's so much help out there for people who suffer chronic pain, we have clinics called [ the pain clinic ] they do a 6 week course for people who suffer chronic pain, ask your dr to set yoou up he'll write to them and then you'll here from them,and be invited along and don't worry because the group of people there are there for the same reason,its groups of 12,so please give it some thought, i wont lie to you it's not going to cure your pain but it's going to help you live with it, As for doing a journal yes its very hard talking to people about cancer that why i did the journal i would talk to myself about my cancer worries ect i found it helped me immensely, i would put it all on my computer every single night, i just got out of hospital on thursday 14th november i had my cancer cut out iv'e to do a follow up in two weeks,and im still doing a journal till i know im fully free from cancer, it's helped me so much and i'm so happy i did, so kimima i hope this bring's you some comfort and don't feel guilty writing how you feel every day it's not a crime your not hurting anyone, this is why i did it, i didn't want to burden anyone , thats why i did my journal, like i said i hope this helps you and all goes well for you and do that journal yes!? thks for getting back to me it was an honour to help you so don't be a stranger take care for now                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              with love lee