Bladder cancer

Hi I was diagnosed 4 weeks ago with bladder cancer and I’m having an op in a couple of weeks. I’ve found it really difficult to come to terms as don’t no what stage it is or if it’s spread . I’ve had to go on the sick from work as my back is so bad and pains in my pelvis . I haven’t been told what’s they are going to do or what is going to happen and I really feel as if I should have been told before the op . Any advice would be good x thanku