It doesn't sound pathetic at all. It sounds really normal. Of course seeing somebody with a serious illness that is missed would make you worry that it could happen to you or to somebody else you know.

I would say that if you lost your loved one recently, it may be something that will just pass on its own, but if it is continuing or it is really bothering you and it sounds like it might be, it might be worth talking to a counsellor or somebody like that.