Bladder cancer fighter

Hi I decided to join this forum to help me get through what seems like a life long fight.

Iv had bowel cancer and then bladder cancer twice.

Thankful to still be here.

6 years since my last TURBT and 3 years since I finished my immunotherapy BCG.

Just had my cystoscopy and have been asked to go back in 3 months due to a red patch in my bladder which was there two years ago but no changes so no worry.

Now my nurse says go back in 3 months but if I want a biopsy I can do that.

I said I trust them and will 3 months make a big difference they said no.

Now home my mind is going over everything and knowing my last one was high grade I'm feeling scared which I never feel, I've always just delt with it all with no fuss, but this time I feel different and iv asked to speak to my nurse about it all as was in a bit of shock thinking I'm going back in 3 months possible biopsy, possible cancer, possibly have to have bladder removed, can't I have treatment again?

Am I getting closer to dying?

It's all going round in my head I can't go yet I've a grandson 2 half whome I adore and need to see him grow up, I have a son who needs me and husband who needs me, it's madness I'm thinking like this but haven't I been through enough, can't I have happiness and health.

I'm 64 I'm scared to know what's next.

Thanks for reading

God bless

  • Hello Sanbaz

    I'm sorry to hear about all that you've been through with cancer diagnoses and treatments over the past years. It's natural that this recent request from the hospital to return in 3 months for another look at this area of redness in your bladder has left you feeling unsettled and anxious. I think many of the members here at Cancer Chat will understand the reasons why you're feeling overwhelmed by things. 

    It sounds as if you have a good relationship with your cancer nurse specialist and I'm glad to hear that you've already asked to speak with them again. Hopefully, they will be able to answer some of your questions and give you some reassurance. They should also be able to tell you about any support services or groups that may be available in your local area that you can access such as Maggie's

    If it would help to talk things through with one of our nurses you're most welcome to give them a call. I know they will be happy to offer any advice, information, and support they can. They're available Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm on 0808 800 4040. 

    Keep in touch sanbaz if it helps to have a safe space to put down in writing how you're feeling and any thoughts, concerns, or questions you may have. We're here for you and will do all we can to help and support you. 

    Best wishes, 
    Jenn
    Cancer Chat moderator 

  • Thank you Jenn, I've spoke again to my nurse and feel a bit more positive and decided to stay with the 3 month check, then fingers crossed things are still ok. Thank you for the contact number which I will definitely keep in mind if needed xx