hello,

my boyfriend (29) was just diagnosed with Acute Myloid Leukaemia and i’m terrified of losing him. I have been with him since i was 18 and am now 28 so 10 years. 

He is my world and looks after me. I suffer with terrible anxiety and he has spent these last years helping me with everything.

he has just started chemo and is very sick. it’s hard to see him like that when he is normally the strong one. I am also struggling at being alone as I have lived with him since i was 20 and he took charge of taking care of the house and kids and driving me to and from work. I am trying to be strong for him and take care of everything but I’m struggling so bad with it.

what am I going to do if he dies? that’s all I think as i try to sleep in our bed alone. I love him so much and the thought of losing him paralyses me. I’m trying to show everyone I’m okay, and it makes me feel selfish to say i’m struggling when he’s laying in a hospital bed sick with leukaemia and struggling with the chemo.

how do i get my life together so i can be there for him without being scared all the time? 

please someone help me