Dad diagnosed with stage 4 terminal lung cancer

My 64-year-old dad used to smoke for 40 long years, but he managed to quit about six years ago. Unfortunately, at the end of January, he was diagnosed with lung cancer. After going through foreign biopsies, PET scans, and various other tests, he received the news last week that he has stage four terminal cancer. It all started in his left lung and has spread to his knees, lymph nodes, and even his other lung. Yesterday, he underwent kidney tests to determine if he is strong enough for chemotherapy and how much he can tolerate. It breaks my heart to see him in such a fragile state. He has lost three stone and is now incredibly frail, experiencing a lot of pain. The doctors have provided him with liquid morphine and referred him to the palliative care team to help manage his symptoms. He recently shared with us that once the results from the kidney tests come back, he will have to make the personal decision of whether or not to pursue chemotherapy. He is aware of the potential side effects and the short extension of time it may offer, but the doctors cannot provide him with a specific timeframe. To be honest, I had hoped that treatment or surgery would begin immediately after his diagnosis. However, it has taken a full two months to reach this point of prognosis, and it has left us absolutely devastated. I have been doing a lot of research on my own, but if there is anyone out there who has gone through a similar experience, I would greatly appreciate hearing your story. It would be helpful to know what to expect, both the positive and negative aspects. Your insights and advice would mean the world to us during this difficult time.

  • Hello Claire-bear

    I'm so sorry to hear that your Dad has recently been diagnosed with cancer. It's never easy hearing that a loved one has received this news and even more difficult when a stage 4 diagnosis is given. Undoubtedly this will have been a very hard time for you all. 

    Often it takes time to gather all the information needed to make a full diagnosis and it sounds from your post as if your Dad has had to undergo quite a few tests for the team to be able to gather all the information they need about his diagnosis and his general health. Hopefully he won't have to wait too long for the results of the kidney test and together with you all, his family, he can make a decision that he feels is right regarding the suggested treatment. 

    We know that for many people this period of uncertainty can be very difficult. It can sometimes help to talk with someone about how you're feeling and I wonder if you might find it useful to talk things through with one of our nurses. I know they will be happy to listen and offer any advice, information and support they can. They're available Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm on 0808 800 4040. 

    Keep in touch here Claire-bear if it helps to have somewhere to put down in writing how you're feeling, or to ask questions. We will do our best to offer any support we can. 

    Sending you all my best wishes,
    Jenn
    Cancer Chat moderator