Hi teamwork 

thank you for reply means so much to me and my hubby at this stage of the dreaded journey ! 
I had been so worked up about chemo from breast clinic the words of oncologist didn’t seem to fit to what had been said all along so a bit of a shock and confusion sunk in and I’m thinking that they just keep saying it cannot be cured Enoch has robbed me of slot of the positivity that I had . Did your wife go through this I wonder ? 

We have been so lucky in that we have a fantastic breast care nurse that we can discuss things with. She has explained so much in simplistic terms. When you hear words like terminal it’s so scary but when you move away from the medical jargon it’s much easier to deal with and come to terms with. 

staying positive is a real challenge for you and your hubby, my wife struggles with it and whilst I do my best, it’s not me living with it so I get why it’s such a struggle. We try to live one day at a time as planning things into the future is also difficult. 

i hope this helps. 

Hi teamwork 

yes staying positive is a challenge for me and my husband but we have started planning stuff in the near like weeks rather than months snd years ahead so like you said taking each day as it comes ! My breast care team are amazing and now I’m with oncology to sort out rest of secondary stuff this next week will be my 4th scan now I’ve had ct pet bone and niw mri to examine the cancer in my spine more closely but it all stem from breast ! 
I got some steroids for my back pain been struggling for 6 weeks with it unable to get about much but the tablets are working as went for short stroll yesterday and we got some sun for a change . 
any hints and tips for my hubby who is struggling wud be welcome x 

That all sounds promising!

i totally get your husband struggling, My wife can’t walk any distance at all and we used to walk quite a lot. But now I don't walk as I feel guilty as I know my wife would love to and she can’t. That in itself means you don’t get the fresh air and exercise that does you so much good. Ado to that I’m sure your hubby is being strong for you and always positive but then he, like me has to compute things and deal with his own emotions. 
i have a brother who lives locally and he drags me out for a point every couple of weeks, not because he likes a drink but he knows it’s good to talk. Doesn’t have to be about the big C it can be about anything but just a change for a couple of hours and someone you trust that you can talk to I find so helpful.

 It’s important to keep talking as a couple but it’s also great to have someone else to offload to, that goes for you a well.