Hello I'm ourlady , you are not alone I and others are here for you scream, shout whatever it is hard , it's draining both physically and mentally , I cry everyday , but like others and you're self I want to live! Say whatever you want to say talk about good things as well thing's you have achieved , things you want to achieve.

One of the things I found extremely hard was friends losing contact, flippant remarks like pull yourself together it will all be over with treatment not understanding stage four never ends. I do believe in god and ourlady Mary I can't give up hope even in my darkest hours.

One thing I really miss is going on holiday just local whether in England or Italy or Spain , but I never could find anyone to go with as soon as I say I have cancer it's an automatic no go  

Remember you are not alone loads of people are going through similar situations diagnosis like you feeling the same as you. When you're with your consultant remember we are all by your side.

Talk anytime you want about anything does not have to be about your illness if you don't want to talk about that. 

Sometimes talking about things you enjoy or have done lifts you up with what you have achieved.

So pat yourself on the back your doing well hold your head up high.

Love ourlady